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The Simple Habit for a Happier Social Life | Nicholas Epley | TED

We are wired for connection, and yet many of us spend most of our lives avoiding it, says behavioral scientist Nicholas Epley. Drawing on decades of research into happiness, loneliness and well-being, he reveals why we consistently underestimate how receptive others are to connecting — and invites us to seize the small moments that lead…

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We are wired for connection, and yet many of us spend most of our lives avoiding it, says behavioral scientist Nicholas Epley. Drawing on decades of research into happiness, loneliness and well-being, he reveals why we consistently underestimate how receptive others are to connecting — and invites us to seize the small moments that lead to a more social life. (Recorded at TED2026 on April 16, 2026)

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30 Comments

30 Comments

  1. @CYSV90

    May 28, 2026 at 11:03 am

    Sounded interesting so here I am 😊

  2. @JosephineMendozaza

    May 28, 2026 at 11:09 am

    Keep on creating! Your channel always leaves a positive impression.💿⛸👒

  3. @mhsakibyt

    May 28, 2026 at 11:21 am

    ❤❤❤ From Bangladesh

  4. @PabiBhul-t3q

    May 28, 2026 at 11:25 am

    I love listening to ted talk

    • @neildmedia

      May 28, 2026 at 12:11 pm

      Thats a good opening question. And if they havent heard of TED talks explain what they are and describe you’re favourite. They can bring it up on their phone and boom youve connected. Just a humble suggestion

  5. @aImaginative-yt

    May 28, 2026 at 11:31 am

    I find myself saying things like ‘that person probably doesnt want to talk or ‘its going to be awkward’ but this video makes clear that people love it much more than I anticipate.
    Last week, however, I actually did it: I started a brief conversation with the woman seated beside me on the train, and she turned out to be quite pleasant and we talked all the way through our journey. I felt unexpectedly happy after the experience.
    Thank you, Nicholas! I will definitely make it a regular practice: Reach out more than you think you should.
    got that one down!

    • @MetalHeadSippel

      May 28, 2026 at 3:24 pm

      @aImaginative-yt I actually hate it when people talk to me. When I’m sitting alone on a park bench, and someone says good morning to me, it pisses me off. No it’s not a good morning, I’ve been single and lonely for forty three years, you think I’m having a good morning? no way. I hate it when people say god bless you after I sneeze: I’m an atheist, there is no god, so keep your Christianity to yourself. I’m thinking about getting a tattoo on my forehead that says Leave Me Alone. It’s never a girl that starts talking to me, it’s always some jerk that has to make some stupid comment when I’m just trying to think about my thoughts when someone else starts bothering me.

  6. @Steffin.K.Christopher

    May 28, 2026 at 11:54 am

    We were wrong about people

  7. @gracetaylor5341

    May 28, 2026 at 12:00 pm

    My favorite conversations have been with random strangers 💚

  8. @thebest2897

    May 28, 2026 at 12:08 pm

    We don’t live in a high trust society. People assume there’s an agenda when you reach out to talk, be it violent or exploitative in some other way

    • @SaltVinegar2010

      May 28, 2026 at 8:40 pm

      @thebest2897 Agree absolutely.

  9. @EstherAmaewhule

    May 28, 2026 at 12:42 pm

    This is for ME to hear❤

  10. @usernamekrn8729

    May 28, 2026 at 12:59 pm

    we’re jaded and hurt by the wrong people so now we don’t talk to new people 😂

  11. @tonyoconnell9071

    May 28, 2026 at 1:00 pm

    Is it me or does sound a bit like the Joker…..?

    • @Craul08

      May 28, 2026 at 5:41 pm

      He has bit of something I couldn’t nail down, but yeh I think that’s it.

  12. @derre98

    May 28, 2026 at 1:34 pm

    I think I lack the social gene.

  13. @AdityaMehendale

    May 28, 2026 at 1:47 pm

    Thumbs up if you watched this on Vox ~3 days ago, and had a deja-vu.

  14. @muhsinabdiwahab114

    May 28, 2026 at 2:11 pm

    People like to talk.

  15. @Moss_knight00

    May 28, 2026 at 2:13 pm

    Man, this is what TED is about, great talk

  16. @kathrynstrauss3429

    May 28, 2026 at 2:20 pm

    I like the idea generally, but I think his experience as a man doesn’t reflect what we women would experience by striking up conversations with men.

    • @hjjkthn

      May 28, 2026 at 3:14 pm

      @kathrynstrauss3429 talk to women

    • @carsonhunt4642

      May 28, 2026 at 4:43 pm

      @kathrynstrauss3429 def goes both ways. I’ve had girls try to talk to me and I have to be slightly rude in order to not make them think I’m open to whatever they are trying at. Tho I’m believer in that guys and girls CAN NOT be “friends”, (one always wants more, not always the guy either).

      And then random guys just aren’t worth talking to. This guy talks like he’s from the past , small community , worthwhile. Everyone today is strangers amongst each other, who don’t get along at all. And love his optimism but most ppl are just not all that worth talking to , unless just want some dumb small talk that goes nowhere, id argue ppl get enough of that from social media. What ppl need nowadays is deeper connections

  17. @selinov

    May 28, 2026 at 3:18 pm

    At a NYE party, I told a young couple that they really looked beautiful and I loved their energy. The response I got? “That’s because you’re old,” coupled with that cynical 😏 I’ve seen so often. My entire crew replied with a confused “what,” and he repeated himself slowly, “IT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE OLD!” It was like talking to an angry 12-year-old, but this guy was in his 20s.

    So, yeah, I’ve learned not to offer compliments to strangers. I’m glad your anecdote worked out, though. 👍🏾

    • @ALCRAN2010

      May 28, 2026 at 5:53 pm

      Congratulations, you met who that person really is.
      Had you not reached out, you would have lived your whole day thinking their energy was lovely.

  18. @eggstravagent3801

    May 28, 2026 at 5:05 pm

    man, this guy knows how to talk 😀

  19. @Craul08

    May 28, 2026 at 5:35 pm

    Are we really so disconnected now that you have to be a sociology professor to be like ‘yo what if I just talk to people on the train?’

  20. @ALCRAN2010

    May 28, 2026 at 5:43 pm

    One weird trick the psychiatrist, psychologist, and therapist cartels don’t want you to know…
    …but bartenders have known for decades.

  21. @juancs-dev

    May 28, 2026 at 5:57 pm

    What an AMAZING talk.

  22. @CarltonMasonNorwood

    May 28, 2026 at 6:17 pm

    Eyes are the window to the soul. Hands are the window to intentions. Watch both. Once you engage with someone they most likely will remember you especially if you help them. They most likely will come back for more. Single serving friends aren’t friends remember that.

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