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Desire doesn’t just happen – it’s created with intention. #TEDTalks

In long-term relationships, we often expect our beloved to be both best friend and erotic partner. But as Esther Perel argues, good and committed sex draws on two conflicting needs: our need for security and our need for surprise. So how do you sustain desire?

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In long-term relationships, we often expect our beloved to be both best friend and erotic partner. But as Esther Perel argues, good and committed sex draws on two conflicting needs: our need for security and our need for surprise. So how do you sustain desire?

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11 Comments

11 Comments

  1. @nisimmakov4172

    June 14, 2025 at 2:07 pm

    тодА бокУ=)

  2. @maduonyema5940

    June 14, 2025 at 2:08 pm

    This is so true ma’am. Being very intentional about love making moves you beyond spontaneity, being conscious of each other’s needs… committed and intentional to being very happy. I totally relate.

  3. @hayeonkim7838

    June 14, 2025 at 2:22 pm

    Hi!

  4. @Iamsatyendraarya

    June 14, 2025 at 2:28 pm

    🇮🇳

  5. @luke-space

    June 14, 2025 at 2:36 pm

    Plenty of baby oil is the answer 😂

  6. @TrườngTranvan-t4i

    June 14, 2025 at 2:46 pm

    *Anyone in 2678?* 💖

  7. @JeremyLMarquez

    June 14, 2025 at 3:12 pm

    Is this the 12 year old content remix 101 for us marketers? We love Ted everything

  8. @melw5880

    June 14, 2025 at 6:14 pm

    I’ve been saying all of these things for years. Well stated and extremely accurate!

  9. @OnondagaDawn

    June 15, 2025 at 1:42 am

    👏👏👏

  10. @john_creates

    June 15, 2025 at 6:57 pm

    Too fast! Slow down. Your loosing half your audience with your rehearsed speech

  11. @MisterE42

    June 16, 2025 at 4:30 pm

    💯

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People & Blogs

Turns out, your group chat might be more powerful than you think. #TEDTalks

Katie Paris quit her career in Washington, DC, to figure out how to make politics feel less like strangers shouting at each other and more like friends looking out for each other. In this practical talk, she reveals why conversations between real people can have a bigger impact on elections than anything millions of campaign…

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Katie Paris quit her career in Washington, DC, to figure out how to make politics feel less like strangers shouting at each other and more like friends looking out for each other. In this practical talk, she reveals why conversations between real people can have a bigger impact on elections than anything millions of campaign dollars can buy.

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People & Blogs

Inside Venezuela’s Uncertain Path to Freedom | Leopoldo López | TED

Activist Leopoldo López learned the true value of freedom in a solitary confinement cell, when someone else decided if he would eat or see sunlight. In this searching conversation, he explains why democracy is losing ground across the globe, the state of Venezuela’s transition after Maduro’s capture and the 2026 earthquakes — and why he…

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Activist Leopoldo López learned the true value of freedom in a solitary confinement cell, when someone else decided if he would eat or see sunlight. In this searching conversation, he explains why democracy is losing ground across the globe, the state of Venezuela’s transition after Maduro’s capture and the 2026 earthquakes — and why he founded the World Liberty Congress to unite activists in the fight against autocracies. (This conversation, hosted by TED’s Whitney Pennington Rogers, was part of an exclusive TED Membership event. TED Membership is the best way to support and engage with the big ideas you love from TED. To learn more, visit ted.com/membership.) (Recorded at TED Membership on September 16, 2026)

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The TED Talks channel features the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world’s leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less) — plus originals, podcasts and exclusive content. Look for videos on Technology, Entertainment and Design as well as science, business, global issues, the arts and more. Visit for our entire library, transcripts, translations and personalized recommendations.

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#TED #TEDTalks #Democracy

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How Would You Design Your Dream City? | James Rojas | TED

Urban planner James Rojas has led hundreds of workshops where participants creatively design their ideal communities with small objects — and he’s noticed that people of every age, income and background build strikingly similar places. Through play and storytelling, he shows how we can use our childhood memories and imaginations to shape the places we…

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Urban planner James Rojas has led hundreds of workshops where participants creatively design their ideal communities with small objects — and he’s noticed that people of every age, income and background build strikingly similar places. Through play and storytelling, he shows how we can use our childhood memories and imaginations to shape the places we live and love. (Recorded at Play@TED on May 14, 2026)

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Follow TED!
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The TED Talks channel features the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world’s leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less) — plus originals, podcasts and exclusive content. Look for videos on Technology, Entertainment and Design as well as science, business, global issues, the arts and more. Visit for our entire library, transcripts, translations and personalized recommendations.

Watch more:

TED videos may be used for non-commercial purposes under a Creative Commons License, Attribution–Non Commercial–No Derivatives (or the CC BY – NC – ND 4.0 International) and in accordance with the TED Talks Usage Policy: . For more information on using TED for commercial purposes (e.g. employee learning, in a film or online course), submit a request at

#TED #TEDTalks #Storytelling

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