Science & Technology
The Difference Between False Empathy and True Support | Chezare A. Warren | TED
There’s a right way and wrong way to do empathy, says author and scholar Chezare A. Warren. So how do we get it right? He unpacks the source of false empathy and explains the key shift in perspective we need to build healthy relationships and truly support others. If you love watching TED Talks like…
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@Otilia-zs8gy
June 4, 2024 at 7:12 am
This thread is a reminder of the beauty and complexity of the human mind. It’s a marvel to behold.🍓
@innerlocus
June 4, 2024 at 7:20 am
GOP RIP my thoughts and prayers, that is false empathy.
@Arashiii87
June 4, 2024 at 7:24 am
Empathy training alone is unlikely to be a silver bullet for addressing issues like discrimination and harassment.
@arcadiagreen150
June 4, 2024 at 1:25 pm
Cultures rooted in failure need to be recognized as failure. Things like communism have always failed because they have been proven to be cultures of failure. Other aspects of society need to understand that losing on purpose and blaming the rules will never make you win
@ThinkPositiveDude
June 4, 2024 at 7:27 am
we wuz empathy
@Muhammad_Cioran
June 4, 2024 at 7:28 am
I remember in kindergarten the teachers guided us to practice helping others. All students are divided into two groups, the problem solvers and those who need help. That experience helped us to develop empathy in various situations to this day.
@arcadiagreen150
June 4, 2024 at 11:48 am
Imagine volunteering able people to fix unable people against their wills.
@MarlineCornish
June 4, 2024 at 7:29 am
8:14:55 1 Like = 1 Pushup 🥺
@IAn0nI
June 4, 2024 at 9:01 pm
U yukky
@zinagrace2113
June 4, 2024 at 7:33 am
Chi-Town stand up!!! 🎉
@nathiginindza9649
June 4, 2024 at 7:35 am
Losing a job or property then hearing people say all will be well, that’s false empathy for me.
@RC-br1ps
June 4, 2024 at 10:02 am
That perhaps is what they like to hear when things do not go their way.
@nathiginindza9649
June 4, 2024 at 10:48 am
@@RC-br1ps perhaps indeed but don’t you think they can do more than that, maybe a more actionable approach.
@RC-br1ps
June 4, 2024 at 2:06 pm
@nathiginindza9649 , actionable as in a hug and a kiss? You assume that people have what it takes to actually solve others problems when in fact many are grappling with their own. Even bas8c resources such as energy and time, leave alone money are scarce. The economic problem is real and ‘scarce resources and multiple applications’ applies.
Poor people tend to help other poor people with the basics…because they face the same problems. Well of peoples’ problems are different. They are real, however they are not quite as easily solvable such as food, shelter, or immediate first aid.
@maggiepfob
June 5, 2024 at 6:18 pm
That’s what we call “Toxic Positivity.” It’s right up there with the whole “It’s all part of God’s Great Plan so what you’re going through doesn’t matter” etc.
@555Trout
June 4, 2024 at 7:52 am
Don’t care. At all.
@tunisian_stats
June 4, 2024 at 9:02 am
Why you gotta be so hateful? You could have just left the video without leaving this comment.
@555Trout
June 4, 2024 at 9:16 am
@@tunisian_statsSimple. His nonsense is destructive, false and evil. I want him to know we know.
@V3RTIGO222
June 4, 2024 at 10:08 am
Not caring is just a lack of empathy… sounds like you proved his point?
@555Trout
June 4, 2024 at 10:43 am
@@V3RTIGO222 False
@V3RTIGO222
June 4, 2024 at 10:47 am
@@555Trout lol… real compelling argument. Not sure you even watched the video, because it effectively points out that to be kind and compassionate you need to be able to see other perspectives, something you seem unable to do.
@kubatilukoye4821
June 4, 2024 at 7:55 am
Very Insightful..
@JamesBPrattJr
June 4, 2024 at 8:05 am
As a long time four eyes educator, this was wonderful! Brilliant connection to engaging with kids with different and comolext cultural backgrounds. We definitely have to see better, differently
@newmewheart
June 4, 2024 at 8:08 am
Valuable 🙏
@AuntyCleo
June 4, 2024 at 8:19 am
🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
@sankaranarayanan901
June 4, 2024 at 8:25 am
04-06-2024
This is an interesting way of looking at empathy.
false empathy – do not help.
To do
1.observe
2.ask
3.act
4.listen to feedback and let the feedback be a reminder for subsequent action..
choose the right lens before showing empathy.
@AntonioPee
June 4, 2024 at 8:44 am
Insightful and timely! Congrats on your TED talk!
@StayVCA98
June 4, 2024 at 9:04 am
A bit unrelated to its entirety of the topic, but on the Title alone, this False Empathy and True Support reminds me of how in SocMed showing this Performative Activism and boycotting (but like completely all bark no action type) on what is happening Palestine by demanding celebrities into a ridiculous high standards, and its saddening because this internet people is taking advantage of the unfortunate situation for trivial matters and not to the genuine cause…
@IAn0nI
June 4, 2024 at 9:00 pm
Great comment. Israel is no worse than Palestine.
@ingislakur
June 4, 2024 at 10:12 am
Looked like a nice topic so I clicked, shame on me,,disappointed it was about race once again
@koby15
June 4, 2024 at 11:00 am
Thank you! And they say whites are racist… I don’t mindfully even consider race until it’s with the people who always bring it up… like, can’t you be an educator? If I went around and constantly made my whole life about my race, you would suspect me of being a supremacist..
@arcadiagreen150
June 4, 2024 at 1:22 pm
I tend to click on these being prepared for it. Watching how the bad side thinks is better than not knowing their tactics at all. Best to read or listen to Art Of War.
@IAn0nI
June 4, 2024 at 9:02 pm
Mr. Kilal B Lacks
@peggyharris3815
June 4, 2024 at 10:14 am
When someone proclaims to you that they are an empath……RUN. They also imagine that they’re telepathic. They know, without asking you any questions,, how you feel. They are extremely ‘special’ and amazingly spiritual, according to them.
This man is speaking the absolute truth concerning empathy. Thankyou!
@Stephan__ox.
June 4, 2024 at 2:48 pm
I said this once and a certain individual CONSTANTLY ‘tested’ me for the empathy bug.
@trj555
June 4, 2024 at 9:27 pm
People who claim to be an empath are exactly opposite of who they claim to be. Run is right 🚩
@arcadiagreen150
June 4, 2024 at 12:03 pm
Instead of fixing a symptom of bad culture, we should be aiming to cure the disease of bad culture. Single parent households, welfare state, non-nutritional foods being covered by food stamps, etc. Our progressive policies have made the situation worse, not better. Black children had more discipline, less incarceration, and higher IQs in the 1960s than they do now. By accident?
@flochfitness
June 4, 2024 at 12:50 pm
Instead of false sympathy, I think of this as the common ground fallacy. “Because we have something in common, you should trust me, and I can relate“ common ground rarely works to establish trust and is often what creates mistrust in relationships.
@trashtvinternational
June 4, 2024 at 4:31 pm
He lost my attention as soon as he started making this about racism… 👎👎
@alexchen4647
June 9, 2024 at 2:38 pm
You only like being empathetic when it’s convenient and doesn’t make you uncomfortable? Racism is one of the areas where true empathy is most lacking so why would a video on empathy not address it? You’re exactly the problem this video is talking about.
@trashtvinternational
June 9, 2024 at 4:09 pm
@@alexchen4647 nice try.
@super_terram
June 4, 2024 at 5:28 pm
Why is a narcissist talking about empathy? I’m confused.
@IAn0nI
June 4, 2024 at 9:01 pm
Yes, why are you?
@IAn0nI
June 4, 2024 at 8:59 pm
Remember folks, white is right.
@EcomCarl
June 5, 2024 at 3:00 am
Shifting from superficial understanding to genuine support not only strengthens relationships but also catalyzes real change. 🔑
@123owly
June 5, 2024 at 3:34 am
“I’ve been studying empathy for 15 years and here’s what I’ve found: even those who try to do it, suck at it”. Ummm…thanks….didn’t realize you needed a phd for that conclusion. With all due respect my guy, thanks for the presentation and all, but if you learned something truly insightful in your studies of empathy, can you please share what those insights were? “Stop, observe, do better” is a tumblr level of advice.
@alexchen4647
June 9, 2024 at 2:33 pm
False empathy is something that almost everyone is susceptible to. The talk is about slowing down and really understanding someone before you act or respond. Judging by your response, it’s clearly something that you fail to do. I find that really funny.
@andycordy5190
June 5, 2024 at 3:53 am
I’m very glad this particular examination of empathy is getting an audience. Empathy is a huge subject, the lack of it is a major barrier to human progress.
As a failed primary school teacher, who didn’t manage challenging behaviour, I want to question some of the observations here.
I am totally committed to empathic, student centred learning, however, the duty of the teacher, however empathic, is to move the whole class forward. It is a phenomenally difficult task to balance the needs of engaged learners, impatient to progress with those of the disengaged students employing negative, disruptive behaviour. The overloaded teacher feels helpless in this plate spinning act, while we are encouraging and engaging the disaffected student/s, the majority of the class is wondering why THEY are not receiving the same support. A teacher who truly manages this is a treasure.
Having worked in prison education and the public education system school environment, I can attest that a community engagement in support of quality outcomes for their children is absolutely vital. That a lack of empathy towards the educational process from the community leads to the attitude that the upbringing of children is the responsibility of the school and not the parent and that school is a processing system of which there are expected outcomes but you just have to put your kids in there and go to work and forget it.
@dogu_u
June 5, 2024 at 6:23 am
0:04
@ArnoLmed
June 5, 2024 at 7:44 am
What a fittiting appropriate talk for these days.
@monica4561
June 5, 2024 at 2:54 pm
Completely agree❤
@maggiepfob
June 5, 2024 at 6:22 pm
That’s what I was thinking: It’s not enough to See. You also have to engage another sense: the power of Listening. Listen. LISTEN! I know… it’s hard to listen to someone whose trust has been so eroded they don’t even try to speak anymore. It’s a whole process. Ask. Listen to the silence that comes back. Ask again. Listen. Listen more. LISTEN! Once you learn to hear, you can begin to know Empathy. Next… Feel. Feeling is scary! Feeling is why we love to believe racism ended in the 60s. We want so much to believe the world is fair and good and makes sense. But it isn’t and it doesn’t – and that’s terrifying! Be terrified anyway. Then listen some more. Listen!
@GaroldPage-dn2qv
June 5, 2024 at 10:09 pm
1:58
@curiousworld7912
June 6, 2024 at 5:03 am
Excellent ‘talk’ on a much-needed topic.
@mercyprestige1961
June 6, 2024 at 12:24 pm
I needed this TED talk thank you Mr A.Warren
@Z06666
June 6, 2024 at 6:43 pm
Racist educators could harm kids without them knowing
@sandeepmenon2822
June 6, 2024 at 11:00 pm
The way I see it, this is just empathy being complicated. Simply put – empathy is acting in such a way that before each thought or action – you say in your head – “This is about them, not me”.
@mirceadodan7426
June 7, 2024 at 7:40 am
Well, we should also ask the asians or hispanics how much empathy they need. They might say they are not interested in empathy, but ask them just in case.
@altonlebronze3536
June 7, 2024 at 11:57 pm
Is sending ‘thoughts and prayers’ after an incident that could have been prevented, false empathy?
@PenelopeBryer
June 8, 2024 at 9:13 pm
If you have studied empathy for many years. You need to meet and understand the people who suffer with empathy like myself. If i see or even think of a human or animal suffering and i can immediately relate and see and feel what its like to live in their shoe’s, i feel pain and aching in my heart, i feel dread, sickly and aching in my gut/stomach, and my thought process is going through every possible way to fix, heal, solve the suffering. In many cases i am unable to help which is long term aching and pain and extreme sadness and guilt. I do try to remind myself that I cannot save the world, I am not solely responsible for saving every suffering creature on this earth. Sadly i can only assume that my traumatic childhood and adulthood is the reason for my extreme and painful level of empathy. Now, at 51 years old i am finally dealing with my cptsd traumas etc through 2hour group therapy sessions where I have been ready to be vulnerable and release the sadness and pain I carry. Realising that my empathy comes from not wanting people to feel the pain and suffering i have felt throughout the vast majority of my life. I just don’t know how to switch off or tone down the emotional and physical urge, need to save everyone from that pain. In essence, i am trying to save and rescue myself, as a cute little girl at 18 months old and onwards.