People & Blogs
Stop Telling Single People to Get Married | Peter McGraw | TED
Why do we assume single people aren’t happy? Behavioral economist (and lifelong bachelor) Peter McGraw advocates for a world in which single life is just as accepted as marriage, debunking the myth that getting hitched is the only path to fulfillment. From spinsters to cat ladies, he outlines the power in chosen family — and…
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@gt-gu7rb
June 20, 2025 at 12:49 pm
Marriage is just a bad bet. 50% of marriages end in divorce. Of the remaining 50%, I would estimate at least a third stay together for financial reasons primarily. That leaves about a third who stays together for the right reason. As a side note, I’m a boomer with two millennial daughters who aren’t even thinking about marriage.
@Communicationskills835
June 20, 2025 at 12:52 pm
What a topic 😂
All singles are super happy
@kinsmed
June 20, 2025 at 12:52 pm
Here ya go, TED Talks. Giving presentations with a little humor.
Makes it more palatable and a little more ‘engaging’.
@theAlps-i6l
June 20, 2025 at 1:02 pm
Marriage is also for when you want kids as a woman, because unless she has inherited money from a divorce she is never going to find a new man to look after another mans kids and live in close quarters. Many single mothers never find a man to have a family again. This talk is for singles without children.
@mctx9371
June 20, 2025 at 1:08 pm
As a single almost 36 years old i get it. But with the rise of singles, if it reaches 100% what do we do? Throw it inside the oven and run? Or we all become writers/musicians and sing about how we never met young person for 50 years? I think that evolution just found another way to reduce human population. It used to be war and plagues, now its just independence.
@dougerdmann9021
June 20, 2025 at 1:19 pm
The leading cause of divorce is marriage!!! Test me
@AurediumRiptide
June 20, 2025 at 1:19 pm
Yeah, this man is right and I am glad more people realize it. Being alone is not the same as being lonely. Living together or remaining single are choices that both have upsides and downsides. We live in an age where living happily single is easier then ever. Many of the disadvantages present a hundred years ago are gone making it easier to live single and still be happy and fairly stress less.
I feel the many…many divorces these days are the result of people being more aware that being together is not necessarily better then being single.
Bare in mind that there are lots of people that live together can just be happy and fulfilled to. There is no wrong or right in single of together. But it does require some things to change. housing markets are stressed because more people live alone so the market needs to keep that in mind. When a new neighborhood is built it should have options for single households as they don’t need or can’t afford a family sized house.
I am also glad with this ted talk. It is a lot better then the cesspool places online that are anti-relationship or anti-women. Such groups don’t do the single community any favor. I feel those are just unhappy people that happen to be single.
@dougerdmann9021
June 20, 2025 at 1:20 pm
It’s better to say I did than I do
@LiamMurphy-o5r
June 20, 2025 at 5:45 pm
I did, but I don’t anymore.
@dougerdmann9021
June 20, 2025 at 1:23 pm
Writing books…. Keystotheuniverse the intentional creators guide…. The book in my heart
@NiNiC83
June 20, 2025 at 1:36 pm
Seriously!! As a 42yoF this is my gripe now
@pw3591
June 20, 2025 at 2:21 pm
Some of my married friends are very happy, and good luck to them, but I look at others and think thank God I’m single.
@macklow2500
June 20, 2025 at 2:54 pm
Or when they say “when you having a kid”
@TheThagenesis
June 20, 2025 at 4:16 pm
it’ll stop – eventually…
@JonitoFischer
June 20, 2025 at 3:35 pm
Grow up dude and get married 😂😂😂!
@niccolom
June 20, 2025 at 4:33 pm
Being single and not have dependents are so great.
They hold me back and prevent me from doing what I enjoy doing.
@niccolom
June 20, 2025 at 4:34 pm
“Get married” is an irrational want and an awful financial decision.
@component8107
June 20, 2025 at 4:56 pm
I can’t take advice from someone wearing that hat inside
@tylersen3318
June 20, 2025 at 6:30 pm
8:41 “a family of one” … this guy must be doped up on some kind of drug… what a sad thing to aspire to.
@cholm8070
June 20, 2025 at 6:34 pm
Some country we are hard to say single forever 😞🇵🇬
@richiev2040
June 20, 2025 at 6:48 pm
But men who preach anti marriage still expect women to sleep with them? Without commitment or provision Sounds fishy propaganda to me.
@AIGoneWrongOfficial
June 20, 2025 at 8:06 pm
Sadly, 80% (if not all) of the married people I know have horrible marriages. They complain all the time yet encourage marriage. Kinda confusing.
@meannush7552
June 20, 2025 at 8:12 pm
Cheers to my older sister. Shes living independently against my family values.
@tristondaniels599
June 20, 2025 at 8:51 pm
I hate this message but as a single man, it’s pretty amazing how others can marginalize you because of it. Your time, money, labor and life is seemingly worth less than others.
@SurfbyShootin
June 20, 2025 at 8:58 pm
He didnt walk away from marriage, *he was sent his own way.*
@ROSELOPEZxoxo
June 20, 2025 at 9:17 pm
Unsubscribing
@Craigbn981
June 21, 2025 at 1:39 am
I’m single and care for my elderly mother. If I was in a relationship, this would not happen. While I’m a full-time carer, I’ve got neither time or energy to look for a romantic relationship.
@Ninguemviu-cw7ee
June 21, 2025 at 11:37 am
Same here. As brazilians use to say “Sem tempo irmão”
@TonyMontgomery18
June 21, 2025 at 7:19 pm
Same here
@paulah2509
June 21, 2025 at 2:13 am
5:20 love it 🥰 trailblazing
@mariaantoniettamontella9173
June 21, 2025 at 4:22 am
impressive
@nur-azhar
June 21, 2025 at 4:38 am
Ok ladies…
@soonny002
June 21, 2025 at 5:03 am
Fun fact…
Did you know that rouhgly than 50% of marriages end up lasting FOREVER??? Scary… 😨
@samcollins8330
June 21, 2025 at 5:32 am
I think it’s sad that we look at all the divorce and unhappily married couples and draw the conclusion not to get married. Here’s the thing: Getting old by yourself is tough.
I work in a hospital where I, naturally, see loads and loads of old and sometimes very sick people. And you can always tell the difference. If they don’t have anybody waiting for them at home or waiting to pick them up, they are much more likely to be depressed.
On the other hand, there are the people whose spouses spend the entire day with them, who tell their spouses on the phone that they love them right before an operation and all the other sweet things.
That’s why I think we shouldn’t give up on marriage and I say this is a fairly young man.
@isabelsucgang5874
June 21, 2025 at 7:31 pm
Hmmmmm not all. More than half that are married don’t get support from their spouses. but tbh I am not sure if it’s also cultural? Its common here in England
@khateramohammadi
June 21, 2025 at 6:12 am
I hate when some people says , girls you must to get married at the age of 20 to 30, otherwise you waste you`r optimal time and you will never find a suitable husband.
@popcornjeans
June 21, 2025 at 6:18 am
My man
@mm3uk
June 21, 2025 at 6:25 am
Older people who have not raised a child should not get social security or medicare, yet they should contribute to pay for parents who sacrificed so much.
@Cm0nd00d
June 21, 2025 at 7:03 am
bro is contributing to housing crisis one single person at a time
@gmflash7
June 21, 2025 at 7:45 am
THIS IS ALL A SIDE EFFECT OF TWISTED CAPITALISM IN THE CITY LIFE.
HOW ABOUT THAT?
@l_z1478
June 21, 2025 at 8:31 am
I love the tagline 😂😂😂😂😂
@oculusisnevesis5079
June 21, 2025 at 8:46 am
This guy brings no proofs. His opinions are his own. Truth is you age happier when having meaningful relationships. That’s been backed by science!
@genevalawrence801
June 21, 2025 at 3:54 pm
Sources, please. I’d like to read that science.
@oculusisnevesis5079
June 21, 2025 at 8:49 am
The graph at the beginning shows barely 5% difference on an already not that great life satisfaction: 7.5
@argynews
June 21, 2025 at 9:35 am
So what i don’t get is what is the point. People have the free choice to do what they want. I wouldn’t encourage people to stay single but i wouldn’t judge them or shame them for it. Not all people want and i think not all people should become parents, especially if they don’t understand the difficulties the requirements but also the joy this brings. Because by having kids you prolong your family you pass down your experiences and your knowledge you help bring up the next generation. From the existence of humans that was our instinct. And the thing is women are the only ones who have the innate ability and gift to bring a person, life to this world. Their bodies are designed especially for this and they have the strength mentally and emotionally to support the children. We give so many benefits to married people because they will have to support a family, which i think is reasonable. Single people have the time and all the money from their income to support only themselves. Thanks for your time if you read it!!
@DaisySon-m2c2v
June 21, 2025 at 10:33 am
I married myself
@TranGiang-c1c
June 21, 2025 at 10:47 am
Make sense~
@snktn
June 21, 2025 at 12:05 pm
Married folks with kids live in their own world and think the world revolves around them
@Artemis583
June 21, 2025 at 12:53 pm
Getting married for the sake of social pressure has always seemed toxic to me. Healthy relationships (including friends and family, not just romantic) should be valued and the goal for happiness.
@TiruneshUfayiso-e1u9r
June 21, 2025 at 1:00 pm
Thank you so much ❤❤❤
@sanyabrestify
June 21, 2025 at 1:14 pm
Когда будет единый стандарт размер телефона ширина 7 сантиметров длина 14 сантиметров толщина 1 сантиметров
@lilweaver2315
June 21, 2025 at 1:24 pm
I do. ➡️ Do I? 😂😂😂 So true! 5:20
@genevalawrence801
June 21, 2025 at 3:47 pm
Re: data – Research identifies MEN as being happier when they’re married. The results were different for women, according to what I’ve seen.
@oletramekaf5603
June 21, 2025 at 6:36 pm
Yeah, this is never happening… honestly, this man is borderline delusional.
He is right about promoting choice, but that has been going on for a while now, he’s not bringing anything new to the table about that.
About the advantages of remaining single, no news there either. And about the challenges of marriage, no news there either.
But, for example, when he says “single people have more time to care for friends and elderly parents”. Sure, bro, but if you have no kids, that advantage vanishes, since there will be no kids to pass that advantage on to the ones getting old next.
And if you think “Oh, so people should have kids so they have someone to take care of them, is that it?!” No. That’s like the last reason in the list. But if it didn’t count, he wouldn’t be citing the mirrored argument, right?
Someone could also say “You don’t need to be married to have kids”. Sure, try raising kids as single parents, see how that goes…
People obviously should weigh all the options and choose what make them the happiest, but the problem is not marriage itself, there is plenty of sorrow in being single too. The problem is people don’t know how to be happy. Be it as single or in a marriage. A truly happy person can be happy in a relationship or single, if they have the wisdom for happiness.
@monica_veiga
June 21, 2025 at 7:57 pm
THANK YOU!!!
BEST SPEECH EVER!
@sicycheung2483
June 22, 2025 at 5:27 am
OMG!!!!!! That is such an enlightening speech!!!!!!!! Thank you , Peter.
@THEIndieMediaEastcoast
June 22, 2025 at 7:48 am
marriage isn’t for the weak.. this guy seems like a weakling to me.. best to stay single bub.
@dmiariana
June 22, 2025 at 7:50 am
This is beautiful ❤. The future is for options.
@shormy4716
June 22, 2025 at 8:33 am
I was thinking about this same thing a few days ago! Yes, family can look different for different people and one person is not incomplete, in a quest to find the other half on this earth.
@MarinaM-o6p
June 22, 2025 at 8:40 am
Bachelor ….hmmm……could care less about it ..
@beerman204
June 22, 2025 at 8:46 am
Marriage offers a great variety of opportunities. So does singlehood….
@antonroux6737
June 22, 2025 at 9:37 am
tell this to all the divorced women with kids who no one wants because they come with someone else’s children and a forever relationship with that person
@brians2328
June 22, 2025 at 12:34 pm
Unfortunately there are plenty of men who will clean up someone else’s mess!!
@richardlynch1094
June 22, 2025 at 11:05 am
Tell aunt Sally you’re gay and she’ll stop asking about your love life. Trust.
@saramirza6709
June 22, 2025 at 11:29 am
The future is about options not prescriptions ,,, 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
@mariamirolyubova6921
June 22, 2025 at 12:37 pm
I loved it! I’m married and I have 2 children and I’m preaching “you don’t have to get married and you don’t have to have children” to my kids. Best regards from a viewer in Ukraine. Peace.
@ProtapBiswas-zo4re
June 22, 2025 at 12:59 pm
Tried all the hacks. ice baths, preworkouts, even dopamine detoxes. none of it clicked. then someone dropped Testosterone Rewired by David Brooks in a comment and I checked it out. been locked in ever since. no hype, just clarity. wild how long I was running on fumes.🔥
@DancerJITU111
June 22, 2025 at 12:59 pm
not gonna lie, i felt numb for months. like i was just surviving, not really living. then someone dropped Testosterone Rewired by David Brooks in a yt comment and i gave it a shot. bro… this book gave me my edge back. not by yelling at me to hustle, but by showing me how to fix my foundation. life hits different now.
@ShaileshJamnik-bq4pb
June 22, 2025 at 1:01 pm
If you’ve been wondering why you’re not feeling as strong, motivated, or sharp as you used to, Testosterone Rewired by David Brooks might just have the answers. The book focuses on the power of testosterone and how increasing it can seriously transform your health and mindset. If you’re tired of feeling drained or out of balance, this book offers some solid advice on how to get back to your peak
@yusufchougle4523
June 22, 2025 at 1:05 pm
not gonna lie, i felt numb for months. like i was just surviving, not really living. then someone dropped Testosterone Rewired by David Brooks in a yt comment and i gave it a shot. bro… this book gave me my edge back. not by yelling at me to hustle, but by showing me how to fix my foundation. life hits different now.
@lelagolighthly2085
June 22, 2025 at 1:07 pm
Love that, thanks!
@MrPlus.-si9jw
June 22, 2025 at 1:19 pm
Nice 😅😅😅
@Thehulkster375
June 22, 2025 at 1:29 pm
Marriage is not some terrible thing. It’s actually very fulfilling and can help you create an incredible life with someone. Society was also built on monogamy. Polyamory lifestyle is not really great for society. And be honest being single can be extremely lonely
@stevechrisman3185
June 22, 2025 at 3:08 pm
CAN be fulfilling but it’s not for everyone.
@philblane5752
June 22, 2025 at 1:49 pm
I love being single. And kids? I made a different choice in life and decided to have money.
@apollodavis4090
June 22, 2025 at 3:51 pm
Me sees the word “solo”
My brain: Solo Leveling
@京狐夢美
June 22, 2025 at 4:05 pm
Marriage is a Christian institution.
Let me say it again
Marriage. Is. A. Christian. Institution.
Humans evolutionarily speaking aren’t monogamous.
I think once people realise this and get out of that Christian headspace, they can actually free themselves up to have meaningful relationships with multiple people and sleep with whomever they want without having to be tied into something that doesn’t evolutionarily suit us.
We lived in communities, hunted together, fought together, slept together, and took care of everyone’s babies regardless of the parentage. That kind of community needs to come back. It’s the healthiest thing for everyone since people get companionship and also their own personal freedom to do whatever they want without being beholden to the rules of one person (like marriage). They just have community rules to follow.
@donnaallgaier-lamberti3933
June 22, 2025 at 5:26 pm
Just be aware that aging alone has many disadvantages. There will likely come a time when the body fails, illness happens and having a loved one there to take care of you or at least help you as needed. Yes you can pay for it but it is not the same as a loved one willingly staying by your side to the end.
@ザキ-u7q
June 22, 2025 at 7:08 pm
Being single is perfectly fine — but let’s not pretend it’s the same as raising a child. Parents aren’t just living their lives, they’re creating the next generation. If you’re not carrying that burden, don’t expect the same kind of support. Equal dignity? Absolutely. Equal benefits? Depends on the contribution.
@TheNattles88
June 22, 2025 at 8:32 pm
Are the people that are single working for 30 years and paying taxes not contributing? More so than the people with kids that are looking for tax write-offs right?
@ザキ-u7q
June 22, 2025 at 9:03 pm
@TheNattles88 I totally agree — singles who work and pay taxes contribute a lot to society, and that deserves recognition. At the same time, raising children comes with a different kind of burden — not just for the family, but for society’s future. That’s why some support is structured differently.
@thehomegirlmonie
June 22, 2025 at 7:20 pm
Why is everyone so triggered? All he’s saying is let’s lose the stigma of being single, it’s not a question of morality or worthiness. Single life is just as legitimate and fulfilling as married life. The “right” lifestyle choice is the one that brings you happiness and peace.
@HungerSTR1KE
June 22, 2025 at 8:33 pm
I feel a lot of contempt being forced to subsidize 1,000 laws and benefits I will never get to experience.
@renatacarrijo8638
June 22, 2025 at 8:55 pm
👏👏👏
@katjaplatin7754
June 23, 2025 at 12:38 pm
Thank you for a very inspiring talk ❤❤❤❤❤❤
@sekuribindu2170
June 23, 2025 at 12:45 pm
Hey brother.. love from the other part of single world❤
@msxperience
June 23, 2025 at 1:01 pm
BRAVO!!!
@Joan-w4h7q
June 23, 2025 at 1:02 pm
Aren’t introverts happy being solo while extroverts want to be coupled?
@sarahg-polymath
June 23, 2025 at 1:04 pm
👏👏👏
@aquilifergroup
June 23, 2025 at 1:20 pm
Hey,go get married
@alo6125
June 23, 2025 at 1:35 pm
I’m a child-free, church-free, husband-free woman. I read and write books, travel, work, play board games, and have a delightful circle of friends and a close sibling. I have a very happy and adventurous life! 🎉
@kittycatty335
June 23, 2025 at 9:27 pm
Thank you thank you thank you for existing. Thank you for your comment and thank you for living true to yourself 🙏🙏🙏
@SGH1111
June 23, 2025 at 2:00 pm
Thank you! Once married for 13 years. Have been single for 38 years and love the freedom. This thought process is progressive.
@Hippocrat3s
June 23, 2025 at 2:08 pm
I think he misses out on the difference between between the US and Sweden in cost of living and general economy. US millennials don’t have the same opportunities to live solo that Swedes do.
@gutsymovies
June 23, 2025 at 2:15 pm
Better to be free and alone than trapped with the wrong person. Looking back on many old girlfriends I thank God I didn’t end up with them.
@beyonder7817
June 23, 2025 at 2:40 pm
thanks
@solracer66
June 23, 2025 at 2:54 pm
The problem is that despite all of our advancements marriage is still a much better deal for women than for men because they can’t loose financially, even if the marriage doesn’t work out they will still come out of it with most of their finances intact if their husband’s job pays the same or more than theirs does. But for men they can potentially loose everything they own, their house, their bank account and even their retirement. IMHO until the dissolution of marriage has equal risk for men and women there will be a lot of men who just won’t take the risk.
@cathyphillips679
June 23, 2025 at 3:41 pm
I grew up believing that if something was expected of me (by my parents and society) that it was the right thing. After my 2nd divorce in 1999, I figured it out and changed my beliefs. I had parents who were married, and happy, for 63 years. It’s just not for me. I am very grateful for, and love, my 2 sons. Them, I always wanted! I was just born in the wrong generation, when having children on my own wasn’t yet acceptable. I have had the best life on my own for the last 25 years! Do what’s right for you.
@TheKelemenkrisztina
June 23, 2025 at 3:51 pm
Fantastic! Thank you ❤
@jzwolak
June 23, 2025 at 3:56 pm
I would have liked to hear more about children in solo life. Peter addresses some of the big push backs and concerns around solo life, but I think the biggest – children – he only offhandedly mentions. I’m not saying marriages must happen for children… I would just like to hear his thoughts on it more.
@Celis.C
June 23, 2025 at 4:05 pm
I love the beautiful wordplay Peter uses. I’d be keen to learn how he came to have such deep connections with others.
@karaleedickerson4486
June 23, 2025 at 5:15 pm
Wonderful talk, and I couldn’t agree more. One change I’d like to see is the end of single supplements charged for travel. While I’ve seen a few travel companies catering to single travelers, I’d like to see that trend continue to grow.
@RobinSingh-gn1vt
June 23, 2025 at 5:22 pm
This comment section probably won’t remember me, but maybe someone scrolling needs this. A few months ago I hit a wall. Nothing made sense. I bought Manifest and Receive by Eva Hartley after seeing it here on yt. I had no expectations. But chapter by chapter, it broke something open in me. Not motivation — momentum. Wishing that for you too.✨
@vikashkante9927
June 23, 2025 at 5:22 pm
If you’re reading this right now, I just want to say; I’m rooting for you. We’re strangers, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care. I know what it’s like to feel like you’re pushing a boulder uphill. I felt that way until I picked up Manifest and Receive by Eva Hartley I can’t explain it perfectly, but it changed my whole perspective. After checking it out on youtube and reading it things have been flowing—money, peace, confidence. Maybe this is your moment too. Stay open. Wishing you more than you ever imagined. 💫💰
@eileenkrol6605
June 23, 2025 at 5:42 pm
Married with 2 child, my life is wonderful. Had I Married my ex though…that would be rough. A relationship is only as solid as the quality of the life raft.
@uprightmovement
June 23, 2025 at 5:50 pm
In the end, many married people find themselves alone—either still married and living together in silence, or apart after divorce.
@billwalton4571
June 23, 2025 at 6:17 pm
People who pressure you say it like we should indiscriminately get any woman. They arent the ones that have to be with that person for life.
@Iris-c5f
June 23, 2025 at 6:50 pm
Superb!!!
@MavenAntiope
June 23, 2025 at 8:50 pm
I have been married and I think single is more natural for me. I can’t think of one marriage that I know of personally that I envy. Not one. Nice people but I wouldn’t trade places with any of them.
@wittlebirb
June 23, 2025 at 9:28 pm
who is this guy w this cool hat and a nice smile