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To understand what makes marriages work, we need to talk about why they sometimes end, says family law professor Jeannie Suk Gersen. Follow along as she lays out three ways that thinking about marital decisions through the lens of divorce can help you better navigate togetherness from the beginning.
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Sim Lucien
May 4, 2020 at 6:54 pm
Understanding divorce is why men don’t want to get married. Its a losing proposition for us.
Kunal Gautam
May 4, 2020 at 6:59 pm
Next ted talk *”how can dying help you live”*
Lisa Mac
May 4, 2020 at 7:05 pm
Kunal Gautam Actually, that was a good one .
Anne Day
May 4, 2020 at 7:13 pm
That’s been done, it was great.
Chevy Boy
May 4, 2020 at 11:13 pm
Ha ha, I have to try dying first instead of listening to a pep talk! Lol. She uses the speech title to sell you how much it will cost to have a divorce counsellor as surely people will need it late.
Evan Shirley
May 4, 2020 at 11:33 pm
Tuesdays With Morrie
Shivshankar Nagarsoge
May 5, 2020 at 12:52 am
😀😀
Laxmikanth Chary
May 4, 2020 at 7:14 pm
In telugu states we have bathukujataka bandi……..to compromise….
Burdflu C-William
May 4, 2020 at 9:34 pm
Some folk grow up so selfishly that the idea of compromise is outside of their realm of understanding.
Jason Ready
May 4, 2020 at 7:16 pm
How many goats are you worth at the end of the day?
Cyndi Warren
May 4, 2020 at 7:24 pm
💖💖💖 Please watch if considering marriage… Going through a divorce and this info would have been so useful before we got married. Thank you!! 🌜Blessings to all!🌛
Anne Day
May 4, 2020 at 7:25 pm
Great talk. Her closing statement felt a little like word vomit, but her three key points were excellently presented.
mmatrainee
May 4, 2020 at 7:34 pm
“She graduates and files for divorce” well, good timing, he gets half now!
Lightning Fang
May 4, 2020 at 10:27 pm
Double standards
مقاطع منوعة
May 4, 2020 at 7:47 pm
In Islam, there are absolutely no problems between the pair and both are understanding
Jesus A_ Prophet_In_Islam
May 4, 2020 at 7:54 pm
GOD said : ﴾And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thoughtAnd of His signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth and the diversity of your languages and your colors. Indeed in that are signs for those of knowledgeAnd of His signs is your sleep by night and day and your seeking of His bounty. Indeed in that are signs for a people who listen﴿ [Quran 30 : 21-23]
l96ai
May 4, 2020 at 10:58 pm
Yeah.. it does not work..does it?
Supernova Kasprzak
May 4, 2020 at 8:00 pm
“Emily and Deb”??? I knew gay divorce would happen _eventually,_ but given the recent struggles in order to gain the right to marry (and the still-possible danger of the Supreme Court overturning that right), it’s just a weird thing to consider a gay couple even doing.
Vash Matrix
May 4, 2020 at 8:14 pm
What a dumb choice of words for a title. Divorce is ending “marriage”. That like the dummies who support abortion saying it saves lives while ignoring the main goal of abortions.
Ramón González
May 4, 2020 at 8:15 pm
Why try to understand divorce? I would think it’s better to understand marriage so you don’t get married in the first place.
Chevy Boy
May 4, 2020 at 10:54 pm
You have to understand she might be selling herself here. I admire your insight. But ‘to be or not to be’, that is the question!
angelisland
May 4, 2020 at 8:27 pm
This talk was so convoluted and hard to follow. smh
Some Random Person
May 4, 2020 at 8:30 pm
It’s like what I remember from adventure time:
“Responsibility demands sacrifice.” -P.B.
Chevy Boy
May 4, 2020 at 10:35 pm
No doubt!
Amata love s*x- TAP ON MY PHOTO
May 4, 2020 at 8:33 pm
something boring, guy ☘ 🍹
ikkedansk
May 4, 2020 at 8:46 pm
what a waste of time
grishma shah
May 4, 2020 at 9:10 pm
1:06 it means men are always wrong for women
Lisa Love Ministries
May 4, 2020 at 9:15 pm
Pray always seek God.
John 14:6
grishma shah
May 4, 2020 at 9:16 pm
5:49 got it, act selfishly in marriage
KGB
May 4, 2020 at 9:18 pm
These pre-marriage decisions depend on a pre-existing balance of power in the relationship.
Chevy Boy
May 4, 2020 at 10:49 pm
This is a prominent thesis about life in North Amerca. Overall, it involves more than this. Wealth and power cannot negotiate that mysterious thing called Love. And I am not a believer of ‘Soul Mate’.
grishma shah
May 4, 2020 at 9:22 pm
8:51 get better at hiding money.
Tony Cole
May 4, 2020 at 10:33 pm
In the U.K. 1 in 2 marriages end in divorce, why on earth people would even bother. It’s a failed institution. As with everything the government is involved with, they always royally screw it up.
Chevy Boy
May 4, 2020 at 11:28 pm
It is a failing institution, no doubt! But divorce is not the government’s fault though they have to catch up with life’s progression. Life condition changes too fast for most countries to catch up with amendments. Royalty is dead, if not dead!
mirtagpa
May 5, 2020 at 12:06 am
Marriage is a partnership. This is a great talk thanks 👍🏽
nonchalantd
May 5, 2020 at 12:23 am
Why even get married? Societal pressure? Fear of missing out? Possessiveness?
Shivshankar Nagarsoge
May 5, 2020 at 12:54 am
I think Ted is producing silly content for publicity. One day Ted will produce video of telling “How dieing helps to live”
Melque Silva
May 5, 2020 at 2:06 am
so, what´s the point of getting married? makes no sense
ricardo ortega
May 5, 2020 at 2:08 am
Totalmente de acuerdo ,es para siempre
Chinese Handwriting
May 5, 2020 at 2:11 am
You should always marry your second husband first!
George J Gilles.:
May 5, 2020 at 2:26 am
I concur with this video.
Sanction
May 5, 2020 at 5:47 am
I’m noticing in college less and less people want to be in relationships…. even some people asking what’s the point. What’s the point of marriage, it seems like a lot of people aren’t having a good time with it as is
Carmen Smith Aguirre
May 5, 2020 at 1:38 pm
Are you noticing that?
pibadar
May 5, 2020 at 5:57 am
I think we need to go back to the original meaning of sacrifice. If sacrifice is being mindful of future events then is it really sacrifice. In today’s society where everything is about fairness.. it’s no wonder divorce rates are at an all time high.
Alpesh Abhijit Chowdhury
May 5, 2020 at 7:02 am
Marriage is a farce.
小杰 &Mr
May 5, 2020 at 7:09 am
I have married my second wife,lol
rajashekhar sardagi
May 5, 2020 at 8:03 am
It was boring to listen. she is not prepared at all. really disappointed.
Yangyang Zhao
May 5, 2020 at 9:23 am
Why must second? I always believe eternal first true love…
Katie Arbuckle
May 6, 2020 at 6:55 am
Than do it right the first time, and set boundaries so you’re “Second Husband.” Becomes you’re “First True Love.”
Fitness_Doug
May 5, 2020 at 9:51 am
Dont get married, its not normal for humans to be bound to only one person for long time. We are poly.
Dimes607
May 5, 2020 at 10:49 am
I understand divorce by not getting married. Completely eliminates the issue
Pentakids Abacus Academy
May 5, 2020 at 12:03 pm
Tawheed Mohammad Sayyid
May 5, 2020 at 1:50 pm
I literally had listened and re-listened to this video endless number of times in order to understand further. This is not to complaint. But to compliment that you have shared with us a wisdom
n sol
May 5, 2020 at 2:10 pm
The new way to look at marriage, Nice video thanks TED
Austin S
May 5, 2020 at 3:54 pm
Jeez marriage just sounds even more terrible than ever.
PG
May 5, 2020 at 4:28 pm
Event 201. Rockefeller lock step scenario document made in 2010. They are taking citizens rights away to have guns to avoid a revolution. Look up the neurolink that musk is working on. They want to kill us off depopulate and connect the human Brain to ai. Read culture and technology by Andrew Murphie & John Potts. It’s all in there as literature not conspiracy. They talk about nano bots. Which can be used to destroy organs. Fauci also said that trumps administration would experience a surprise outbreak back in 2017. This is a PLANDEMIC.
ArianeIsAwesome
May 6, 2020 at 1:04 am
I’m not trying to be racist or anything like that but most of the people who are getting a divorce are white and black because if you’re Indian and you get a divorce, honey it’s going to be really hard to find another husband because most Indians have this image that if you got a divorce once you’re going to keep getting a divorce over and over with everyone they marry it’s not the person you’re dating who’s the problem it’s their parents
imbintor Gamoza
May 6, 2020 at 1:26 am
Wow your very EXCELLENT my frnd..you have a huge big Family at YT world..i love you my frnd…
kenneth Gamoza
May 6, 2020 at 1:26 am
Wow your very EXCELLENT my frnd..you have a huge big Family at YT world..i love you my frnd…
imbintor Gamoza
May 6, 2020 at 1:33 am
Here in my country in Philippines thers no a case for divorce coz we don’t have a divorce bill until now..
kenneth Gamoza
May 6, 2020 at 1:33 am
Here in my country in Philippines thers no a case for divorce coz we don’t have a divorce bill until now..
TheRawBabe
May 6, 2020 at 3:55 am
contribute, owe, give, give up 4 elements to discuss openly during marriage in order to keep a marriage ❤
TheRawBabe
May 6, 2020 at 3:56 am
sacrifice v fair exchange, no free childcare, yours becomes ours! 3 golden rules to remember BEFORE getting into marriage ✌
Alec marin
May 6, 2020 at 5:06 am
If you want good advice don’t get married in the first place cuz divorce ruins most people ends in broken families broken children and even suicide and the justice system it’s just a tool to exploit the human suffering
Thomas Coolidge
May 6, 2020 at 5:32 am
Managed to make it 18 years on my first (and only so far) marriage. Eventually she just gave up on us and even she admits it.. She decided she just wanted to stay home with her parents. I moved to make money for us since she didn’t want to do anything more than what she wants.. yeah she decided she wanted the money I earn just without me. Going on 6 months of divorce now.. 18 years of work for nothing…
SalaTheDon
May 8, 2020 at 5:33 pm
I hope you get better man!
Thomas Coolidge
May 6, 2020 at 5:39 am
It’s easy to say all this but none of this matters in a marriage… if you try to play the protection game it’s used against you as being non-supportive of the marriage. We don’t go into marriage planning on divorcing.. if you are then you shouldn’t be getting married in the first place. You never plan to fail. You should be making it work.. the problem is when you are trying to make it work but the other person isn’t. When the other person changes…
1NELife
May 6, 2020 at 6:16 am
Grate information!
M Sajid Ali tv
May 6, 2020 at 8:19 am
Good speech
Ly Mata
May 6, 2020 at 10:09 am
I can relate to this discussion..
Your Majesty
May 6, 2020 at 10:24 am
This is crap advice. Basically she says you need to have hindsight. Which doesn’t happen until after (the definition of hindsight)
Oh, and make all your decisions as if you’re getting a divorce.
Delbert Annis
May 6, 2020 at 6:12 pm
Always put yourself last and always take care of yourself. Different societies and cultures understand, or understood what this lady s talking about. Unfortunately, the American Society is riddled with, me, me, me, I, I, I, entitled mentality. Don’t know what the heart if for until it’s broken. So sad. Live and learn, instead of learn, then live right. Nice to see a woman in a Dress 👗 everything is fucken spandex now.
zxqwerxz
May 6, 2020 at 9:41 pm
I can’t help but draw a parallel to a line from Frankenstein,
“To examine the causes of life, we must first have recourse to death,”
So to figure out what works in a marriage, you look at divorce… Not very romantic if i’m being honest and not a first date conversation starter.
Raven von Frankenstein
May 7, 2020 at 4:07 am
MGTOW is the way!
Happy gO Lucky
May 7, 2020 at 4:40 am
A marriage works by loving each other through communication, sacrificing, honesty, and ever trying to change your spouse.
MILES CHANNEL
May 7, 2020 at 4:36 pm
Some people are Lucky to get married
Jonny x
May 8, 2020 at 4:10 am
Don’t expect your other significant to change for you.
Mariam Kookies
May 10, 2020 at 4:31 pm
True
TRENDY HACKS
May 8, 2020 at 7:21 am
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
helix427
May 8, 2020 at 6:42 pm
Lisa didn’t need Andy for money anymore, so she discarded him like a piece of trash and looks for a richer, higher status man that she feels she is entitled to now.
ClumsyBug
May 9, 2020 at 4:36 pm
Lisa isn’t real
Nico Joshua
May 9, 2020 at 8:37 am
Adam Driver on Marriage Story and Star Wars every 4th May:
“May divorce be with you”
Gigi Elizabeth
May 11, 2020 at 11:59 am
It’s not realistic to think like this…
Mihail Colun
May 11, 2020 at 12:29 pm
So talking about divorce before marriage, counter intuitively strengthens the marriage
Rachel Vensand
May 11, 2020 at 7:48 pm
“Sometimes the things we do out of love can be the very things that make it hard for that love to last” that part.
Jesus Alfaro-Garcia
May 12, 2020 at 4:26 pm
I like her dress.
IKap
May 12, 2020 at 10:16 pm
Interesting perspective