People & Blogs
How to come out at work, about anything | The Way We Work, a TED series
When TED media coordinator Micah Eames came out as trans at work, he quickly realized he’d need to start having tricky conversations with coworkers. Here’s his advice for how you can open up about your identity at work and what your colleagues can do to help. The Way We Work is a TED original video…
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Mratyunjay Kag
November 30, 2020 at 4:57 pm
I love his shirt.
Fred Dobbs
November 30, 2020 at 5:14 pm
ITS shirt. You love its shirts. It is an it.
Sinestesia13
December 1, 2020 at 1:05 am
@Fred Dobbs Ok boomer
Fred Dobbs
December 1, 2020 at 1:20 am
@Sinestesia13 Boomer?! Dude. I’m 27.
Sinestesia13
December 1, 2020 at 1:23 am
@Fred Dobbs You’re 27 and thinking like a boomer? Wow. Feeling kinda sorry for you now.
MultiFreakface
November 30, 2020 at 5:06 pm
I dont see this having any standing outside of the trans community
MultiFreakface
November 30, 2020 at 5:07 pm
Why make the email include the skin part? unless for self-comfort in sending it
L. G
November 30, 2020 at 6:12 pm
To make it less awkward. It gives opportunity to start the conversation and to not make it ALL about the coming- out
Sam Brown
November 30, 2020 at 5:18 pm
I really don’t like cats
Monkeyheadtpc
November 30, 2020 at 5:20 pm
“Hey people, I have dry skin, does anyone have any tips? Also, I am a very unemotional person and would love to be left alone about any and all of your personal life. It’s okay to mess this up, we’re all in this together.
Thanks”
marcos
November 30, 2020 at 6:13 pm
wtf
Monkeyheadtpc
November 30, 2020 at 6:54 pm
@marcos This will be my coming out email tomorrow. I’ve suffered under others for long enough. Thanks to this video I now found the courage to communicate my needs.
marcos
November 30, 2020 at 11:17 pm
@Monkeyheadtpc this is awesome i’m happy for you
טל סייג
November 30, 2020 at 5:32 pm
Thank you so much! I’m a trans man like you and I’m happy to say that so far everywhere I came out I had wonderful responses, and got lots of love and support by everyone. Yes, sometimes people will say silly things or ask silly questions, but I know that it’s not because of malintentions, only from ignorance. I try my best to be patient and explain everything as best as I can.
privat privat
November 30, 2020 at 6:33 pm
hey the new world is not build in a day…we only have just begun!
love from belgium!
Luka I
November 30, 2020 at 8:53 pm
Thats awesome(: so happy for you!
R4nd0mdude11
November 30, 2020 at 6:17 pm
Yeah i dont think you need to come out, i knew just from the thumbnail
Dakota
November 30, 2020 at 6:26 pm
Get lost.
Catchy Experiments
November 30, 2020 at 6:27 pm
RANDOM FACT: The highest mountain in mainland Spain is located in the southeast of the country and is called Mulhacén. It can be found in the Sierra Nevada mountain range and is 11,413 feet (3,478 meters) tall.😎
AM Channel
November 30, 2020 at 6:58 pm
Barbs from Geography NOW!?!?!?
amethystvvitch
November 30, 2020 at 7:42 pm
Thank you so much for sharing this, Micha! All the best xx Jude
rb93077039
November 30, 2020 at 8:04 pm
Try coming out at work as a Conservative or Repulican, and see what happens.
In fact, try coming out as having anything other than utopian left-wing beliefs, and it really doesn’t go well, and there’s no-one willing to advocate for / defend you and so the alienation and harrassment leads to you either quitting or being ‘managed out’.
Luka I
November 30, 2020 at 8:52 pm
Your shirt roughly resembles the trans pride flag 🥰🏳️⚧️
Luka I
November 30, 2020 at 8:58 pm
Thank you Micah 😊
Star Gazer
November 30, 2020 at 9:27 pm
Go to work and do your job!
Your sexuallity is your business.
I don’t go to work and say, I’m straight, single mother, broke ..I go to work and say my name is Susie, how can I help?
Right Wing Media
November 30, 2020 at 9:44 pm
Exactly 👏 The victim mentality is strong in this woman.
nicholas schear
November 30, 2020 at 10:33 pm
As much as I would like to agree with you that my sexuality is my business, we do not live in a day and age where it is this simple. It is much easier to tell your coworkers you are lgbtq ahead of time in case they ever come in contact with your partner without notice. I would assume and hope that if someone met my partner they would just accept me and wouldn’t care, but often enough that doesn’t happen. Also, if you are in a work environment you might want to build a community, which means people like to share aspects of their personal life. No one ever tells a married women to stop talking about her husband, but people will immediately ask a gay man to keep his boyfriend to himself.
ABWABWABWABWABWABWABWABWA ABWABWABWABWABWABWABWA
November 30, 2020 at 9:58 pm
could men get any more weak than this
Sinestesia13
December 1, 2020 at 1:02 am
Yes, consider the existence of other men that are triggered by gays on Youtube for a second.
M. Schmitz
November 30, 2020 at 10:30 pm
Thank you for sharing. 🙂 …Am I the only one here, who knows the serie shameless and the transguy Travor in there? This is a funny coincidence. They look pretty the same.
Alex Fischer
December 1, 2020 at 7:53 am
Elliot Fletcher? I only know him from Faking It, but him and this guy look nothing alike! But yeah, similar style.
jem benton
November 30, 2020 at 10:31 pm
Pure vitamin e oil at night is really good. Aloe vera also good, keep it natural.
Verena Satriani
November 30, 2020 at 10:35 pm
I like the way he explains everything. All words reflect confidence.
Minivan Recon
November 30, 2020 at 10:42 pm
News flash. You weren’t fooling anyone to begin with.
nicholas schear
November 30, 2020 at 10:52 pm
To everyone looking for advice and just trying to be themselves, you got this. Don’t listen to the trolls in the comments, you are valid and loved. 🖤🖤
Devyn Christopher Gillette
November 30, 2020 at 11:17 pm
You’re a girl. Accept reality.
Kazoo Hours
December 1, 2020 at 2:25 am
Its not affecting you in any way, accept reality.
Matt Phelps
November 30, 2020 at 11:23 pm
Needed this <3 Thank you Micah!
Mauricio rodriguez
November 30, 2020 at 11:25 pm
Thank you!!!
Zaineb Hameed
December 1, 2020 at 12:01 am
I used to think I’m a dog person until I had my first cat, I adore her well I have two now. Just don’t compare cats with dogs because they are as different as you and I in some points. Give it a try and hopefully you’ll understand what I mean. Oh, and I think you’re an amazing person. Take care
Georg Plaz
December 1, 2020 at 7:47 am
to say “cats and dogs are as different as you and I” doesn’t really help your point. compared to the huge differences between cats and dogs, the difference between us is minute (since we are both humans), so with your comparison you actually implied that cast and dogs are not all that different.. 😅
Errant Cognition
December 1, 2020 at 9:06 am
@Georg Plaz People have way more variation in temperament and personality, what are you talking about
Georg Plaz
December 1, 2020 at 10:00 pm
@Errant Cognition but that is an arbitrary scale. a very human centered scale. I think if you had an alien entity creat tests to measure the difference between to beings, pretty much all them would say that the average dog is more different from an average cat than two randomly picked humans
Errant Cognition
December 2, 2020 at 4:20 am
@Georg Plaz Bruh, we’re talking about a human choosing between a dog and a cat. A theoretical alien literally has nothing to do with it. It’s not even a “scale,” it’s a perception
Rheder Silva
December 1, 2020 at 12:13 am
The world should not care about what U want to push
John L
December 1, 2020 at 2:56 am
Good onya Micah, well done mate 🙂
Hayk Beroyan
December 1, 2020 at 5:55 am
It’s disgusting when Turkey can kill entire nation and say it was a war. Every lie has an end and this is the end of Turkey’s lies and blackmail.
Alva D.
December 1, 2020 at 6:21 am
Why do you need to come out at work? You just force people to accept your personal opinions about your private life. They don’t get any choice to answer react honestly about that because otherwise they’ll be sent to HR. Work life is professional life. You can come out to colleagues/friends after work. Your sexuality and/or identity shouldn’t have anything to do with your work or performance so why force that onto people?
I don’t mean that offensive at all. I just don’t understand why you would keep private things private.
Laurent Pingault
December 1, 2020 at 7:05 am
How do you end you ?
Georg Plaz
December 1, 2020 at 7:39 am
This video is outrageous! someone openly promoting the “made up idea” of not liking cats! ridiculous
jk ❤️ 🐈
Jessica Washington
December 1, 2020 at 11:28 pm
He does like cats don’t worry!
Esther B.
December 1, 2020 at 8:18 am
I’m distracted from this interesting topic by the idea that people are lying about being allergic to cats when they really just don’t like them. This is a huge problem for those of us with actual allergies to things. People always suspect us of lying. They want to see your whole face swell up when really it’s your lungs getting mucus in them that No one can see. It’s not ok. No one should support anyone who comes out about being such a destructive, entitled liar. Why not lie about having cancer, then come out? Or about being raped? Because it’s unforgivable. Same with lying about having allergies. Yes it is. You’re just so fucking corrupt you don’t know it.
Edward Kyle
December 1, 2020 at 8:58 am
Go back! Please just go back.
Errant Cognition
December 1, 2020 at 9:04 am
So if I send an unsolicited personal email saying I don’t like cats, but instead I’m not talking about cats and instead I’m talking about not liking left wing sociopolitics, that’s cool too then?
Alexander Vok
December 1, 2020 at 10:06 am
Why come out as a trans in the first place? If some woman wants to “be” a man, she should just look like a man, behave like a man, work like a man etc. and hence be treated by co-workers like a man. If woman doesn’t look like a man but still wants to be called “he”, then, of course, the explanations are necessary.
Moog
December 1, 2020 at 4:54 pm
ok tenderqueer
Grim Rabbit
December 1, 2020 at 5:51 pm
To anyone looking for advice and just trying to be themselves, it’s a job stupid. Do you’re job and go home. Your coworkers don’t care how valid you personally don’t feel and don’t need to love you, stupid. 🖤🖤
chris tello
December 1, 2020 at 6:36 pm
how did I get here?? hahahaha!!!
Jacky Mo
December 1, 2020 at 9:43 pm
Ah, yes. My comment got deleted for not meeting woke standards.
Sinestesia13
December 2, 2020 at 6:17 am
I love how you people give “common sense” an ugly name like “woke standards” in order to feel less like a bunch of dirtbags for positioning yourselves against it.
Jacky Mo
December 2, 2020 at 12:26 pm
@Sinestesia13 You don’t even know what I commented in the first place, but yeah, call me a dirt bag. Sure.
Jessica Washington
December 1, 2020 at 11:29 pm
Y’all ever see someone you went to college with on ted and feel a little bit famous because of it? I do 😆 congrats Micah on your awesome job!
d3Rm0Nk
December 2, 2020 at 12:13 am
I feel like the “we’ll all mess up my name/pronouns including myself” is really important for some people.
Like, I still accidentally adress myself with male words, so why should I super hate on others for that.
It’s new to all of us
Also I am very anxious about coming out at work albeit working super well in my private life <.<
evolgenius
December 2, 2020 at 2:39 am
Conservatism. 🤫
Luq Nichols
December 2, 2020 at 6:42 am
No way! Congratulations Micah, this was a great video! I did a double take when I scrolled past this. Love to see Flyers on TED!
WyomingWoodscolt
December 2, 2020 at 9:42 pm
Live well, be happy…
Daniel Adrian
December 3, 2020 at 9:46 am
“They’re the same person you’ve always known them to be”… now with the added power to control your language and behaviour, not bad!
MyYou Tube
December 3, 2020 at 6:39 pm
TED stands for technology Entertainment Design where does Trans fit here
The war now against humanity nature
Molly D
December 4, 2020 at 11:50 pm
If you think it’s hard to leave a relationship, but you are experiencing any sign of infidelity you need to say to yourself, “I can do better,” and just leave. I had no choice but to contact a professional tech guy who I got introduced to by my friend, he helped me hack my partners phone and I found out he was cheating , I even got to see his deleted messages, pictures and videos. I had no choice but to confront him and leave the relationship Because it became too toxic for me. I know someday I would find the right man for me. Incase you need the same service from the professional tech guy , you can contact him through Gmail : cyberhackanswers @ gmail. com or Text/WhatsApp: +1 626 578 5544, or send him a dm on instagram @blonde_hacker_ infidelity hurts.
stating what you want him to do, he’s affordable. No one deserves to be cheated on. i confronted him . At first it hurt so much, but then suddenly, I felt free and good. Trust me, it’ll feel a lot better once you accept that the relationship is over.
‘];’.