Visit to get our entire library of TED Talks, transcripts, translations, personalized talk recommendations and more.
When Shaka Senghor and Ebony Roberts ended their relationship, they made a pact to protect their son from its fallout. What resulted was a poetic meditation on what it means to raise a child together, yet apart. In this moving and deeply personal talk, Senghor and Roberts share their approach to co-parenting — an equal, active partnership that rolls with the punches and revels in the delights of guiding their child through the world with thought and intention.
The TED Talks channel features the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world’s leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less). Look for talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design — plus science, business, global issues, the arts and more. You’re welcome to link to or embed these videos, forward them to others and share these ideas with people you know. For more information on using TED for commercial purposes (e.g. employee learning, in a film or online course), submit a Media Request here:
WCMelle
May 14, 2020 at 4:06 pm
Address the abuse . U address the problem
WCMelle
May 14, 2020 at 4:06 pm
Accepted
Enlightened Beings
May 14, 2020 at 4:08 pm
Yeah very crucial video for today’s generation of parents..very informative…thumps up..
#Enlightened Beings
Ana Sylvia Hoppenbrouwers
May 14, 2020 at 4:10 pm
Coparenting in peace is a blessed gift to give your children. It is essential to value your children first above your own pain and forgive each other. I see my coparent as a soul who helped me bring my two adorables into this world. Despite what happened between him and I, we will always be our children’s guiding force and light. I refuse to let society, friends and family members to dissuade me from working alongside my coparent. Many people demonize and do not understand my coparenting relationship but God does. Let light and love open your heart and soul to work WITH your coparent.
Patrick B
May 14, 2020 at 4:25 pm
I thought TED was supposed to be educational.
El Fin
May 14, 2020 at 4:35 pm
Patrick B you were wrong. Ted talks is for 100 iq reddit tier normies who enjoy indulging inspirational word salads void of logic.
Gwendolyn Williams
May 14, 2020 at 6:36 pm
@El Fin how can you white men need. Non whites, People of color, wasn’t bothering Whites White ppl go after the entire world. And then you have the audacity to pretend that you guys are the victim. This ongoing insults on black peoples has to stop. GTFOH trolling this channel idiot troll Rumpelstiltskin.
miras mt
May 14, 2020 at 4:30 pm
You sound so sweet, awesome.. 😜
Just give them the aspirations in full swing…. 😍
Love is passion
Love is kind
Love always protects……..
Love always saves……..
EtimJohn Productions
May 14, 2020 at 4:44 pm
Amazing! Thankful to the wonderful parents for sharing their story. I hope and pray people in these situations benefit from this Ted Talk. This young king will benefit greatly because his patents have chosen to put him first!
El Fin
May 14, 2020 at 4:46 pm
Their purpose was to say blacks are persecuted. Ebt, WIC, Welfare, section 8, affirmative action, +15 points added to SAT scores, scholarships only for blacks, a media complex that shills only for blacks and minorities isnt enough for these people. They will never be happy until all whites are locked in cages or dead.
The reason they have a broken family is because the woman cares more about her career than her family. Simple as.
Gwendolyn Williams
May 14, 2020 at 7:00 pm
White People never been oppressed / white people receive welfare more than anybody / Once a bigot, always a bigot, cause skunks never lose their stink. Black Americans fought in the War 2, when they came back, they were not respected, didn’t receive vet benefits. Jim Crow laws /the KKK, they traded in their Hoods for police badges, police cars and German Shepherd, to kill people because of their skin.
E Anne Maffett
May 14, 2020 at 4:56 pm
Thank you for being brave enough to be authentic. Your example as two individuals United is beautiful. He is a very fortunate little boy.
Be Safe. 😷
Peace. 🎶
Cheryl Taylor
May 14, 2020 at 5:09 pm
I left the house 🏠 with out my charger cord or adult pampers some body 🙃 please help if this phone doesn’t stay charged 😑
Sandra Hall
May 14, 2020 at 5:39 pm
Black love on display, Amazing for the world to see. These parents are a role model for the world. Together in spirit for the child they created, even tho not together as lovers. I can’t say enough about how this moved me. Thank you for allowing us on the magic!
Sheila Kaindi
May 14, 2020 at 6:02 pm
TED wouldn’t it be lovely if we got to see the boy as a teen, young adult and as a father as well?
Scribbli Chheery
May 14, 2020 at 6:03 pm
Easiest method: Don’t get a divorce
Why do people even get married if they’re going to divorce in 5 years? You people are only hurting your kids!
Funk Daddy
May 14, 2020 at 6:04 pm
TED Talks are not as good as they used to be 🤦♂️
Mr Mike
May 14, 2020 at 6:24 pm
Now, this is a worthwhile TED Talk. I can appreciate their honesty, openness in public and desire to love their child more than they evidently could one another (although it sounds like they truly share a common love). Personally, I think It a shame that for whatever reason (none of our business what it is) they cannot be a “typical” family. However, they stand as a positive example for parents in the 21st century that share the marriage and parenting experience of Ebony Roberts and Shaka Senghor. May God bless and guide them and their son all together.
Lisa Burridge
May 14, 2020 at 6:29 pm
Nice
Shann Parra
May 14, 2020 at 7:21 pm
🎼Absolutely BEAUTIFUL💕🙏🏽
Anna - I love S*X : * TAP ON MY PHOTO
May 14, 2020 at 7:54 pm
something boring, dude 🐈
Meta Self
May 14, 2020 at 8:04 pm
They should have avoided divorce.
STM Lifestyle
May 14, 2020 at 8:52 pm
Love this .
UTubeuzername84
May 14, 2020 at 8:53 pm
What an adorable little boy! The woman was gorgeous, what was he thinking letting her go?
baconwittyeggs
May 14, 2020 at 10:35 pm
Beautiful!
Naomi Forrest
May 14, 2020 at 10:48 pm
It’s so good to see that there are others with the same mindset.
This is the message I preach to the father of my sons but he does not have the ability as yet to look beyond that which he knows and the unfamiliarity of my concept to his person causes me to wonder if he is resilient to see things differently.
My heart is firmed in the belief that making changes, makes the difference. 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿
dazza1008
May 15, 2020 at 12:47 am
Very unusual to have a TED talk where two are talking to each other, but it’s very effective. Good on you for setting the example and supporting each other.
World's Netizen
May 15, 2020 at 1:28 am
Wow, delete my comment, you disappoint me as well.
First, don’t waste your time, of course, others. Your magic only works on “the animal level”, which is like humans could be grown like Tarzan as well.
Moreover, when it comes to adversaries or allies, blacks asked national reparation for slavery while ignoring their ancient ancestors were alpha males who dominated the entire land of Africa, which was the reason why others walked out of Africa by risking their lives and built their homes on other continents and became others “races”.
Second, I never said your magic works. How could anybody make anything based on a wrong/false thing? See, you have no clear thought of what you are doing and what others’ saying. Not to mention that nobody has the responsibility to meet your expectation. Let alone, your expectation was only a one-sided imagination that only exists in your dream.
Third, easy come easy go, your laziness, fluke mind and to speculate advantage by trickery can only waste your time. Stealing others’ results doesn’t mean you really gain what you stole, let alone what you stole has nothing to do with the thing you wanted.
Forth, you have no clear thought about what you are doing which isn’t a problem can be fixed by one or two magics.
World's Netizen
May 15, 2020 at 1:28 am
Wow, delete my comment, you disappoint me as well.
First, don’t waste your time, of course, others. Your magic only works on “the animal level”, which is like humans could be grown like Tarzan as well.
Moreover, when it comes to adversaries or allies, blacks asked national reparation for slavery while ignoring their ancient ancestors were alpha males who dominated the entire land of Africa, which was the reason why others walked out of Africa by risking their lives and built their homes on other continents and became other “races”.
Second, I never said your magic works. How could I/anybody make anything based on a wrong/false thing? See, you have no clear thought of what you are doing and what others’ saying. Not to mention that nobody has the responsibility to meet your expectation. Let alone, your expectation was only a one-sided imagination that only exists in your dream.
Third, easy come easy go, your laziness, fluke mind and to speculate advantage by trickery can only waste your time. Stealing others’ results doesn’t mean you really gain what you stole, let alone what you stole has nothing to do with the thing you wanted.
Forth, you have no clear thought about what you are doing which isn’t a problem can be fixed by one or two magics. The hard way is the only way. Roman was not built in one day.
charlotte wong
May 15, 2020 at 1:36 am
Respect and sympathy are the keys for building a better relationship.
Ben Verzijlbergen
May 15, 2020 at 2:15 am
The world does not dispise black joy..
Jagdip Singh
May 15, 2020 at 2:18 am
These parents set an amazing example of not just co-parenting, but on being a good parent in general💖😊amazing talk
Mohamed Amash
May 15, 2020 at 2:47 am
That’s the magic power of our kids that can change ourselves .. only in front of this power you can endure anything and give up all your needs ..!
Trung Do
May 15, 2020 at 2:51 am
This is incredibly helpful for people who suffer from co-parenting
Alex Lopez
May 15, 2020 at 3:23 am
“We honor each other’s role in Sekyu’s life”
I love that statement. Respect comes before love, always. Blessings to this family.
Duane
May 15, 2020 at 3:28 am
That was so beautiful! Thank you TED!
Mini Falda
May 15, 2020 at 4:19 am
Thus the present generation has been produced
Is anyone surprised
Fatima Hasan
May 15, 2020 at 5:01 am
Wow!!!!!
World's Netizen
May 15, 2020 at 9:19 am
I repeated so many times, your wrong way, your own grapes, your own food.
I choose my apprentices in my own way which has nothing to do with you blacks apparently since you can’t be reasonable by “book” wrote by myself. There is no “co” can be done. Can’t it be more obvious?
Ben Richards
May 15, 2020 at 12:26 pm
Can’t it be more obvious than your *incoherent* post? Yes.
Lawrence Puwelei Kombut
May 15, 2020 at 11:03 am
Awesome !
ITouchTheSky 8GladysWorld8
May 15, 2020 at 5:20 pm
I admire both of you. You’re a good example for being a good parents. Lovely watching and listening your video from the top of Italian mountain.
Amanda
May 15, 2020 at 6:02 pm
I’m not crying. You’re crying. The ending is beautiful!
Ashanti Perkins
May 15, 2020 at 8:02 pm
Low key teared up when they did the affirmations. Black excellence personified
Sandra B
May 15, 2020 at 8:37 pm
This is exactly what I told my ex I wanted if we ever split. He was never mature enough to handle something like this. Our daughter is now 24 and I always wonder how different her life would have been had we coparented like this
Kimberyote3
May 15, 2020 at 8:57 pm
TED: Selling the Ghetto, un American lifestyle.
justin fwibber
May 15, 2020 at 11:12 pm
Why do they…both talk like this…where they pause…at unnatural spots?
Karma Cifer
May 15, 2020 at 11:56 pm
You make so much as a parent only by not talking bad about the other parent with your kid. My parents can have opinions about each other and that affects my perception very much, but luckily they never trashed each other, because that must feel like you can’t count on your parents or as if you had no one to trust.
DiscoChixify
May 16, 2020 at 4:10 am
My son’s father and I had an on again off again abusive relationship. It was difficult, to say the least, when we split up after 6.5 years. In a lot of ways I still have love for him, but we were always better friends than we were in a relationship. It does make our current relationships hard at times. But, as we tell our son, the one thing we all agree on is that we love our little boy. Our son has four parents & doesn’t have any memory of what it was like before. For him, it’s always been that way & always will be. We get looks & comments all the time from people who don’t understand how we co-parent. We even call each other mom & dad in public. A child can never have too many people who love him. During my pregnancy that’s what I wished for; “I want him to have more love, more friends & family, than he knows what to do with.” This wasn’t the future we had imagined while waiting for our baby to arrive, but for as long as we keep love in our hearts, so shall it be.
Sampiro Locke
May 16, 2020 at 5:02 am
You put your kid’s chances of great success in the toilet by divorcing & contributing to societal problems as he’ll struggle with identity, loyalty, love, honor, trustworthiness, lust, possible molestation as he seeks other father figures, drug abuse, filling the family void with a gang family, etc.
It’s not the govt’s (taxpayers in reality) to pay for peoples’ kids. It’s YOUR responsibility.
Mo Gordon
May 16, 2020 at 11:04 am
This is truly beautiful and a lot of take homes for someone raising a Queen just embarking on this co-parenting journey. I can, and will do better. Thank you x
Chris
May 16, 2020 at 11:43 am
That was very inspiring and agreed with a lot they said. But didnt agree that you just let a child do exactly what they want when they want. The supermarket being a strong point, I just didn’t agree with this statement. Is it ok to let your child still eat with their hands like an animal so they couldn’t use a fork when their older. Theres elements where you cant just let a child do what they want when they want. The supermarket comment I found very strange. Your educating you’re child how to behave in society et cetera. Just struggled with that statement. If that’s her view on a supermarket then apply that to everything else in life. Just doesn’t work that way.
A Google User
May 16, 2020 at 7:41 pm
I thought this was about co-parenting as allies?? I got lost in the too many messages…I’m so over people needing to make everything about so called race; black or white….habit ruins everything…we, the whole world are ALL JUST HUMAN. May the rainbow children unite the world.✌💛🙏💞
couch pup
May 19, 2020 at 1:35 pm
it’s almost like your race shapes your experience, imagine that.
Teri Scallon
May 16, 2020 at 9:04 pm
‘good job baby’
Andreia Muhitu
May 17, 2020 at 2:46 am
Who else fell in love with this family’s hair
레알노답토마토 l
May 18, 2020 at 5:04 am
ㅠ
l레알노답토마토
May 18, 2020 at 5:04 am
ㅠ
ValuePlus
May 19, 2020 at 7:48 pm
😅that’s a gorgeous woman. We’d have to just work that out lort! Lol
IKap
May 21, 2020 at 1:30 am
Beautiful