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3 Steps of Anxiety Overload – and How You Can Take Back Control | Lisa Damour | TED

Anxiety is a normal part of life, so why are we so afraid of it? Psychologist Lisa Damour breaks down how to recognize when anxiety is helpful and when it’s harmful, offering simple solutions for calming yourself and taking back control when you feel it slipping away. (This conversation, hosted by TED science curator David…

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Anxiety is a normal part of life, so why are we so afraid of it? Psychologist Lisa Damour breaks down how to recognize when anxiety is helpful and when it’s harmful, offering simple solutions for calming yourself and taking back control when you feel it slipping away. (This conversation, hosted by TED science curator David Biello, was part of an exclusive TED Membership event. Visit ted.com/membership to become a TED Member.)

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#TED #TEDTalks #anxiety

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51 Comments

51 Comments

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    February 14, 2023 at 12:11 pm

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  2. I am Me

    February 14, 2023 at 12:21 pm

    It’s just unfortunate that we’ll know that watching this doesn’t change a thing but ourselves do change us

    • ynot

      February 14, 2023 at 9:10 pm

      there will never be a magic pill in this life, either we accept the challenges because they are what make like interesting or we call everything anxiety and keep avoiding the challenges

  3. propius ad veritatum Dei

    February 14, 2023 at 12:33 pm

    Step 1: change the world

  4. Jennifer McCarty

    February 14, 2023 at 12:46 pm

    If only every therapist was this clear. Truly anxious minds are reeling in a soup, and a beginner clearly plain statement like the one relayed in this video is necessary to cut through the noise. Then it can be followed by exploration of catastrophic thinking.

  5. Gage

    February 14, 2023 at 1:08 pm

    Thank you Dr Damour. Deep breathing with the Cognitive/Behavioral fundamentals and how it all connects to the reality of neuroscience.

  6. dirtsky

    February 14, 2023 at 1:17 pm

    liberals would rather just take pills, you’re pissing in the wind..

  7. Jess Mason

    February 14, 2023 at 1:17 pm

    Should I go down that dark alley or not 🤔 .✌️ It’s Extremely useful.

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    February 14, 2023 at 1:30 pm

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    • mike paul

      February 14, 2023 at 1:54 pm

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      February 14, 2023 at 1:55 pm

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      February 14, 2023 at 1:55 pm

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    • mike paul

      February 14, 2023 at 1:56 pm

      thanks for the info 🥰

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      February 14, 2023 at 1:56 pm

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  9. Mindfulness with Matt

    February 14, 2023 at 1:42 pm

    Anxiety is alerting us what we need to take care of internally. Not easy but can be incredibly transformative. Great tips

  10. David Boson

    February 14, 2023 at 2:13 pm

    anxiety stops you from getting too fat, from wasting money, from crossing the road with out looking etc etc etc. But too much stops us from doing Everything!

  11. Andreas Ardent

    February 14, 2023 at 2:13 pm

    We coach men how to overcome approach anxiety and get a girlfriend.

  12. It's Me

    February 14, 2023 at 2:35 pm

    Wow, thank you Lisa.
    Now I can work on things that makes me anxious.

  13. Lucas Martins

    February 14, 2023 at 3:17 pm

    Great message but I can’t help be impressed by how amazing her apartment is! Lovely furniture, colors, and use of space

  14. Raffaella

    February 14, 2023 at 4:02 pm

    In Europe, and possibly everywhere, we are in the brink of a (nuclear) war, facing huge and uninterrupted immigration from Africa and Middle East, experiencing uncontrolled climate changes….. !!!! If today you are not anxious, you probably live in another planet. Sorry, but I find this speech to be so banal and insignificant!

  15. Henry Chang

    February 14, 2023 at 4:03 pm

    I love this Ted talk so much. She explained anxiety in a way that’s very easy to understand and offered ways that are practical to use. She also answered those questions really well!!!

  16. Si Maximillian

    February 14, 2023 at 4:11 pm

    I nev would believe that slow breathing works. did yesterday with an anxiety attack and it totally worked. you have to focus though.

  17. Si Maximillian

    February 14, 2023 at 4:15 pm

    I think that its the mind more than the lungs but it totally works.

  18. 1goldinga

    February 14, 2023 at 5:03 pm

    Omg life is not doing what I want. Panic panic. Wtf are we giving these people time. They use to just slap sense into you back in the day. Maybe shake you a bit. But now they pump you full of hormone altering poisons labeled as drugs hoping it does minimal damage while it masks or alleviates symptoms. You are anxious because you choose not to deal with things rationally and get ahead of yourself with what the results will be. No amount of drugs will fix that. No amount of videos will fix that. You either fix it by stopping it or you allow it to continue. Just like that. You get short of breathe, then take deep ones. Worry about what others think about you stop thinking about them. If your unable to control yourself and your mind then that literally is what your problem is and it’s not anxiety. It’s your inability to control your own thoughts. No drug can fix that. Want to stop smoking, then do it. You don’t need a patch you just need to want it to stop. Then you won’t do it anymore. All these doctors and fields for people just being lazy and soft and unwilling to accept responsibility for their own thoughts. Thinking some drug will help you….society has gone insane. Just insane.

  19. Alex

    February 14, 2023 at 6:41 pm

    Wow, this is the most articulate, clear and helpful thing I’ve ever seen about anxiety, thank you for that!

  20. InformaticsNurse Bev

    February 14, 2023 at 6:52 pm

    ♥️

  21. Soldier Forrester

    February 14, 2023 at 10:40 pm

    I love her energy, just watching the video improved my mood! Great topic aswell.

  22. Wesley Gordon

    February 14, 2023 at 10:44 pm

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      February 14, 2023 at 10:58 pm

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      February 14, 2023 at 11:00 pm

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      February 14, 2023 at 11:00 pm

      HONESTLY, I WILL SAY SHE IS AN ANGEL WHO GOD HAS SENT TO HELP THE NEEDY

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      February 15, 2023 at 12:43 am

      Scammers all over ted vid

  23. Rey Fairburn

    February 14, 2023 at 10:46 pm

    On her point with teenagers, don’t immediately dismiss the anxiety. This generation of teenagers is the first generation raised with the modern internet and connection surrounding them since birth, we weren’t designed to handle this amount of connection. Combine that with the hormonal soup that comes with puberty and adolescence and it’s no wonder more kids are anxious these days.

    • Lewis

      February 16, 2023 at 12:13 am

      The Internet was a terrible idea.

  24. Dan Miller

    February 14, 2023 at 11:41 pm

    This is not helpful for those of us that feel anxiety and despair due to events beyond our control that will harm us (like a deteriorating medical condition that will kill us – particularly associated with breathing in my case – or a condition that will cause ongoing pain where doctors have exhausted all options, like my brother).

  25. Kirk_C

    February 15, 2023 at 1:51 am

    Oh please. Do not use the term ‘Hack’. It’s so 2020 and you do yourself a disservice by using it. That was trendy a minute ago (see what I did there?) Nothing you can teach me to manage anxiety is a ‘Hack’, certainly deep breathing is not. What you’re trying to convey here is fundamental, useful and I thank you for that but don’t suffer the pitfalls of trendy language.

  26. Imran Nazir

    February 15, 2023 at 5:01 am

    This reminds of of the zoom talks we’d have from my previous employers health and well being executive. She was a very similar looking well spoken blonde, white woman giving us advice on how to cope with lockdown. The irony of it was that like this lady she was talking from a home office whose area looked almost as large as the ground floor of my house. Others in the call were listening in from their tiny bedrooms, some with bikes behind them.

  27. None of your Damn Business

    February 15, 2023 at 8:45 am

    *Anxiety is produced by the media and social networks.*

  28. Andy

    February 15, 2023 at 10:40 am

    Funniest comment I’ve read for many a year.

  29. Sviaxq U

    February 15, 2023 at 1:16 pm

    1. breathing(biological feedback)
    2. mind shift(anxious excited)
    3. narrow the gap(imagination and ability)

  30. Lewis

    February 16, 2023 at 12:17 am

    Step four, benzodiazepines.

  31. ContactKinetic67

    February 16, 2023 at 5:21 am

    One of the most useful videos I’ve seen about dealing with anxiety. (and she’s beautiful to boot)

  32. rhythmrecall

    February 16, 2023 at 5:35 am

    I found this incredibly helpful with concrete exercises and simple explanations. Thank you, Lisa and David!

  33. Amina088

    February 16, 2023 at 2:05 pm

    One of the best TED talks I have listened to! It’s helpful to remind ourselves that anxiety isn’t inherently bad, but it does require our attention to examine it more closely. Plus, it is always a good idea to try to be accurate with your feelings, especially when it’s the conversation you are having with yourself. Although the answers as to why you are feeling what you are feeling may not be pleasant for you, accepting the situation you are fighting in is a first step to healing and recovery.

  34. Belief Before Glory

    February 16, 2023 at 6:36 pm

    “We suffer more in imagination than in reality.”
    —Seneca

  35. Swande

    February 18, 2023 at 3:37 am

    Thank you very much for this, Lisa and TED!

  36. Kai Elvin

    February 18, 2023 at 11:59 am

    Pretty good summary by ChatGPT:

    I. Introduction

    – Anxiety has both healthy and unhealthy forms
    – Healthy anxiety serves as an alarm system that keeps us safe
    – Unhealthy anxiety occurs when there is no threat or when the anxiety response is out of proportion to the event

    II. The Three Steps of Anxiety Overload

    – Body Reacts
    – Physical reaction includes increased heart rate and quick, shallow breathing
    – Sympathetic nervous system prepares body for fight or flight
    – Decision to Call It Anxiety
    – We decide to label the physical reaction as anxiety
    – This can be arbitrary but can also be helpful
    – Catastrophic Thinking
    – Overestimating risks and underestimating our ability to manage the risks
    – Leads to a feeling of helplessness and misery

    III. How to Take Back Control

    – Calming the Body
    – Controlled breathing can activate the parasympathetic nervous system and reset the body to its resting state
    – Square breathing or box breathing can be helpful
    – Reframing Thoughts
    – Shifting our thinking from “I must be anxious” to “I’m excited” can make a difference
    – Questioning our own thinking and assessing our ability to manage risks
    – Exposure
    – Avoidance feeds anxiety and makes it worse
    – Exposure can help reduce anxiety by facing our fears

    IV. Helping Others Manage Anxiety

    – Validate that anxiety makes sense most of the time
    – Teach people to use breathing, reframing, or questioning their thinking to turn down the dial on anxiety
    – Encourage children to describe their feelings in more detail to bring more nuance to the language they use around anxiety

    Overall, anxiety can be a normal and healthy response, but it can also become overwhelming and unhealthy. Understanding the three steps of anxiety overload and how to take back control through calming the body, reframing thoughts, and exposure can help us manage anxiety and feel more in control.

  37. Ирина Минаева

    February 19, 2023 at 12:20 pm

    Sorry,but I haven’t heard anything knew…

  38. Mary Cerrone

    February 19, 2023 at 5:21 pm

    When I feel one coming on I close my eyes and think of Sun shining on me with deep breathing. That helps me.

  39. Invox

    February 19, 2023 at 6:11 pm

    I’ve been suffering with anxiety ever since I had neighbours during the pandemic playing loud music all the time into late hours of the night.
    Now, everytime I ear my neighbours, no matter what they are doing, or even if it is low, my Anxiety spikes to the point I have to use earplugs to take a nap or just leave the house altogether. The loud neighbours are gone and the breathing exercises help so I can sleep well, but I stil struggle with it everyday.

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The TED Talks channel features talks, performances and original series from the world’s leading thinkers and doers. Subscribe to our channel for videos on Technology, Entertainment and Design — plus science, business, global issues, the arts and more. Visit to get our entire library of TED Talks, transcripts, translations, personalized talk recommendations and more.

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#TED #TEDTalks #work

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