Have you ever had a hard time doing daily household tasks — cooking, cleaning, laundry — and felt like a terrible person for struggling in the first place? Therapist KC Davis is here to flip that negative internalized script with a simple yet perspective-shifting fact that may change your approach to life. Learn a gentler, more practical approach to mental health as Davis shares hard-won wisdom and helpful shortcuts on how to get by when you feel like you’ve barely got it together.
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Harriett Banish
January 5, 2023 at 4:55 pm
This was already published?
mrtransmogrify
January 5, 2023 at 4:59 pm
I put my dirty dishes in the fridge or freezer… until I need it next or until I can wash it. The leftover food doesn’t go bad that way. And when I wash, I immediately wipe dry and use it. Dont even need a dish drying corner.
mrtransmogrify
January 5, 2023 at 5:02 pm
I use trolleys so I can quickly shuffle around things that I need to the position that is most accessible for me at that moment. Or place them around my bed or chair to be at an arm’s reach.
Maribelle Lebre
January 5, 2023 at 5:05 pm
“Good enough is perfect “
Yeah man!
❤
Chinmay Desai
January 5, 2023 at 5:33 pm
Freedom from the insecurities of life, from mundane false notions clinging on to the self. Liberation, peace, happiness…
This resounds with the message of Bhagavad Gita as it is…
2828colleen
January 5, 2023 at 5:52 pm
❤
katherandefy
January 5, 2023 at 5:55 pm
Jaw dropt… in a TEDTalk. Lady is awesome.
FirstName LastName
January 5, 2023 at 6:11 pm
Why does this have so many down votes? 875 (likes), 568 (dislikes)?
פיזיקה בכר
January 5, 2023 at 6:26 pm
SO TRUE AND IMPORTANT
Charlee152
January 5, 2023 at 6:27 pm
KC, thank you for this story. I have 4 loads of laundry sitting in baskets that need to be put away (headed upstairs soon). And, I bought pre-pasted toothbrushes as I listened. Can’t wait until they arrive on Saturday.
Batman66
January 5, 2023 at 6:29 pm
Gawd we’re a soft Nation.
T S
January 5, 2023 at 7:16 pm
Love you on TikTok!!!
Mark Porritt
January 5, 2023 at 7:23 pm
This is a repeat. I’ve seen her before on TED!
Isaac Qadri
January 5, 2023 at 8:13 pm
I have been struggling with showing so much, i usually go weeks without showering, but then i take a long shower a really hard shower. right now i don’t know what is causing this behavior, but i definitely i have disorders and anxieties such as SAD, might ASD too, and ADHD along with OCD, nobody was able to understand me as well, nor my parents thought of taking me to a doctor or a therapist, i self diagnosed myself and trying to understand my current situation that has been going on since i knew myself.
LeftOfToday
January 5, 2023 at 8:18 pm
I’ve had to adapt due to chronic pain and fatigue. I got a second, flat-style laundry basket that hides behind my bedroom door so I can throw the actual dirty clothes into it instead of the floor since the clean clothes barely ever make it out of the actual basket. I bought an apartment-sized dishwasher that hold 5 gallons of water and doesn’t have to be hooked up to my sink, and that’s enough for me to get what I use clean. These are just the corners I cut while being off of work this past year given my health issues, and I still find it frustrating what I can’t get done while being home all damn day.
Chuchu Man
January 5, 2023 at 9:01 pm
I really liked the story and speech KC Davis said. I really think we need more speeches like this.
Squintillions
January 5, 2023 at 9:06 pm
I find it is easier to stay on top of chores by having a regular time set for them. For example, make a habit of washing all your dishes and/or loading the dishwasher after dinner every night. Listen to music you like or a podcast while you wash to make it more enjoyable. Pick a day or two each week for laundry day, whenever that fits best into your work/life schedule. Set a timer (like on your phone that you keep with you) after you put your laundry in the washing machine so you will know when it is done and don’t forget it it and can put it in the dryer or hang it up without leaving it in there.
If there is anyway you can afford a cleaner to come every couple weeks, do it. It is so worth the money, especially if you have small children who require a lot of your attention.
Barbara Adams
January 5, 2023 at 9:09 pm
Thank you for yor talk. Im a single grandma with ADD and I just put in a load of laundry. Im out of clean clothes. Thanks again.
Barbara Adams
January 5, 2023 at 9:41 pm
My motto when I finally do a task, ” It’s better than it was.”
Wesley Agustian
January 5, 2023 at 9:45 pm
Thank you so much for this video. Im suffering with a MDO, and it’s hard to live in a country where everyone and everything prioritises functionality and I feel like not being able to fit into these ideas were painful for me. I feel like I have to show others that I’m functional, I am worthy of being hired but at the same time I am having such a great struggle to leave my bed. Watching this video resonates with me strongly. Thank you so much. I hope I am able to create an environment where I am able to grow well. Therapy here is expensive.
Vladimirs S
January 5, 2023 at 10:13 pm
Shet, she made me cry
R_Smith Ko
January 5, 2023 at 11:47 pm
Good enough is perfect ❤
Gloria Hodgson
January 6, 2023 at 12:45 am
Truly an incredible discussion.!
Very honest & liberating
lve been in constant pain for 4 years lve spent most days sitting in my kitchen amongst the squalor of my household chores. Thank God l am now, healing and lm able to do more things around home .. but still, not everything. This refreshingly honest discussion is very necessary to accept that we can only do what we can .. under the circumstances and to truly accept that and forgive ourselves.
l have a plastic container full of dirty dishes covered in soapy bleach water because l am just not ready mentally to physically do them.
Now l Am realizing .. l can Do more chores.. so l do.. what l want and what l can manage.
l would love to see the original website of your coping strategies.
Easy Az Car Cleaning
January 6, 2023 at 1:05 am
We’ve been operating from a 2 pile laundry system on and off for 13 years, after my partner’s ptsd made living… different. Clean pile on the couch, dirty pile on the floor. Occasionally it gets to a draw.
Good enough is perfect 👌
Love this. Sharing it for others to see ❤️
Diane Preeper
January 6, 2023 at 1:25 am
I’m so glad that I watched this talk. Had me in tears. I do not suffer from depression at this time, but I do live in a near constant state of disappointment with my shortcomings as a wife/mother/housekeeper because of my chronic health problems. I hope I can internalize some of these thoughts.
Nurul Auni
January 6, 2023 at 4:11 am
Is this a re-upload? I remember watching this before
LeonSabit
January 6, 2023 at 5:16 am
Good enough is perfect. 🙂 I love your Ted Talk. It is so beautiful and useful for our daily lives.
Goobian
January 6, 2023 at 5:40 am
I have learned to set boundaries with myself. When the tasks are done for the day, and I feel that anxiety coming on, the day is done and it’s time to rest. Dishes can wait until tomorrow. Pushing myself beyond my limit to do dishes I will make mistakes and make things worse.
Kuan-Yu Chen
January 6, 2023 at 6:01 am
I literally started crying 2 minutes into the speech and couldn’t stop. Thank you so much for sharing this!
Britt
January 6, 2023 at 8:56 pm
Me too!!
AThirstyPhilosopher
January 6, 2023 at 8:13 am
I needed to hear this today. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
CwaiCwai
January 6, 2023 at 8:27 am
I needed to hear that. I’m glad I clicke on this.
No
January 6, 2023 at 8:29 am
She’s really pretty in like a old school cartoon way, like betty boop or snow white, she’s also such an immediately likable person. She has a lot of good traits. I like her.
It's hard to swallow the tea when it's REALITY
January 6, 2023 at 9:03 am
I didn’t mean to be here but I’m glad I did… It provided me a trigger to realize myself that it’s ok to have bad days… To really understand that it’s ok that it won’t last.. and allowed me to become more self aware and self loving…
Sohan Ahammed
January 6, 2023 at 9:16 am
Great advice!
Maria LS
January 6, 2023 at 9:57 am
I really enjoyed this Ted talk. Very powerful and inspiring message
Dipti Dixit
January 6, 2023 at 9:59 am
This is completely opposite of Kon Marie method and I am gonna blend both and simplify for myself….
ismail ogunlana
January 6, 2023 at 11:10 am
beautiful 👏🏽
Saurabh Prabhu
January 6, 2023 at 12:04 pm
Good advice, but it fails to address the root cause which is the amount of stuff people buy. The reason one needs to put so much mental effort into organizing is because you have too much to organize. Live with less.
Capsule
January 6, 2023 at 10:13 pm
Good point, but that’s not what this video addresses. There can be many root causes for having excessive stuff in the house. It may also be possible that they need all of the things in the clutter, especially if you have kids.
Hannah Flowers
January 6, 2023 at 12:09 pm
Thank you so much for this. It’s life-changing.
Avani
January 6, 2023 at 2:10 pm
There are days when it’s hard to get out of bed. When you said “autopilot is broken”, a light bulb lit up in my head. Something as complex as depression has never before been simplified this beautifully. Thank you for this talk. Really, really needed it.
zero wezero
January 6, 2023 at 2:16 pm
Ted …DET
No name
January 6, 2023 at 2:48 pm
Love it❤️Good enough is perfect
Sam Lange
January 6, 2023 at 4:01 pm
Theirs no difference to doing your laundry when your depressed or not it gets cleaned the same way and done the same way I have done laundry when I have been happy sad mad etc. It’s the same thing just do the laundry we don’t need this Ted talk on how to do your laundry when depressed
L Morgan Reynolds
January 6, 2023 at 5:42 pm
wow. All those whuppins’ over a messy room then and now just made sense. Hat-tip to you from ”The Pile” hugz
Zombie of the Wasteland
January 6, 2023 at 9:17 pm
I bet he votes democrat.
Racheal Braley
January 6, 2023 at 10:39 pm
What she said about wrinkling baby onesies is the same realization i had about underwear. Does it even wrinkle? What’s the point if it does?
Though sometimes i can be the person who finds enjoyment in color coordinating my closet. To others I might seem spread out or messy.
Andrew Strelecky
January 7, 2023 at 1:03 am
which is awesome, if you enjoy the act of color-coordinating your stuff! That means you’ve found the way to do your task that gives you happiness. and that’s what’s most important.
Aaron Austrie
January 6, 2023 at 10:52 pm
Great speech I must say 👏🏾
Aaron Austrie
January 6, 2023 at 10:59 pm
Stop caring what people think of you!
Aaron Austrie
January 6, 2023 at 10:59 pm
Stop dwelling on the past instead focus on the present!
Tracy Brasells
January 7, 2023 at 12:22 am
This was really interesting. As a health care professional I’d love to explore this further with weight loss and self care for chronic illness like diabetes.
chaitali nath
January 7, 2023 at 5:28 am
“Good enough is perfect” is such a phrase loaded with compassion !
Dan Miller
January 7, 2023 at 9:03 am
Thank you for this. This is the closest I’ve heard to real problems and solutions that I face. I’m crying right now.
Han Han
January 7, 2023 at 9:57 am
Ok
Florentine Nice
January 7, 2023 at 11:27 am
11:07 Honestly showering was (and still is) always the hardest for me. I also had problems with brushing teeth, cleaning up, getting out of bed etc. But I kind of found a routine that’s working for me now. The day I get up and will just shower (and then not stay 2h in) I know I’m completely fine. If anyone has tipps please I could use them. I also had days where I would just lie in bed and do nothing except drinking not much water and going on the toilet but that’s it. Just sleeping because hey you don’t want to die because it’s scary but you also don’t want to live… Sleeping was the in between. Not living not dying. It got to a point where I haven’t seen the sun in 4 months. I’m better now but… I still need to see a doctor about my health; I still have trouble combing through my hair; I still wonder if… when people notice; I still wear the same clothes that hide my body… The worst thing is that you can’t talk to anyone. If they don’t have been through similar they will judge you and break you down. If you are one of those people please just scroll on. No need to comment. If you are like me: it will get better. You just have to keep yourself busy.
Rhaynne Ramones
January 7, 2023 at 1:20 pm
The part “it’s even worse if your mom died” hits. It happened to me last year. When that happened, the laundry in our house pilled up and it was my responsibility as the older child while take care of my sick father (who also died 2 months after my mom) and my younger sister who is still an elementary student. It was a mess. I am a mess. My relatives have been telling me “do these” and “do it like these” and it has given me anxiety and even lose trust in myself. It’s hard when you lose a mother but it will more hard when you lose both. I pity myself so much cause I am still a teenager and I experienced all of these things. All I want is to go to therapy to heal and help myself and my younger sister while living alone but I still can’t. Today, I successfully finished half of the load of 2 baskets of laundry. I am so proud of myself.
I am supposed to scroll through TED videos for inspiration to do my speech for a school task but I get so emotional about this problem. I’ve been stuck at it but I will not lose myself in the negativity and I want to enjoy life to show my two loving parents in heaven that I didn’t regret taking care of them and make them proud of me, every day. Thank you so much for this wonderful speech, Ma’am KC Davis.
JediAcolyte
January 7, 2023 at 2:32 pm
YouTube knows me too well!
Chenemi Talks
January 7, 2023 at 3:44 pm
❤️👍🏽✨
ShayLynn
January 7, 2023 at 4:37 pm
After watching this video for a few minutes I realized it was your tiktok I saw last year that made me change my closet into a no fold system that works for my ADHD. It changed my world until we switched to winter and I’ve felt like a failure because my winter clothes are too heavy to hangover my baskets. This TED talk really refreshed the original idea for me, it’s not working for me anymore and that’s okay I just rework it to fit what I need! Thank you!
polytwobeers
January 7, 2023 at 5:52 pm
I don’t agree with her! When you stay at home it’s very difficult to motivate yourself to work! but she shouldn’t try to normalize being a complete mess at home. Her family deserves better and they’re dependent on her
Karin Turkington
January 7, 2023 at 5:56 pm
Repetitive tasks can be the hardest because they’re so on-going and never-ending and generally done alone. I remember, as a depressed teenager living on my own and crying because doing the dishes made me so sad. I think it brought home the reality that I was really alone in my mess. What I wanted and needed more than anything was someone to be there and help me to get through it all.
Remrau
January 7, 2023 at 6:01 pm
I stumbled across this video and I’ve learnt to practice some of this since a while back. The “Good enough is perfect! and anything worth doing, is worth doing half-assed.” is very well put, as well as take as many shortcuts as possible. “Cheat” to make things work, for you. Do the bare minimum. The coffee cup anecdote was great in that regard. And remember, you are not weak when you struggle. Struggle means that you are fighting back. You are not giving up. Because you are still here, and you’re hanging in there. This is strength, not weakness. Keep struggling, in the least resistant way possible.
Karin Turkington
January 7, 2023 at 6:11 pm
Beautiful. Such an important presentation.
chatafucup
January 7, 2023 at 7:43 pm
We all know, the food you eat is and will always make you depressed. So its as simple as this! Change what you eat and your life will come together quicker than you can say, therapist! I promise you this.
Unlucky Charms
January 9, 2023 at 1:42 pm
That’s an ignorant and unhelpful comment. We don’t all know that. We all know diet can help but it’s not a cure and to say otherwise is harmful to people who struggle with real depression. 😡
Olivia
January 8, 2023 at 2:46 am
She would make a great comedian
Sailor Cherry
January 8, 2023 at 3:30 am
Thank YOU!
nocreativityforthename
January 8, 2023 at 6:13 pm
Just dont make babies??
Catherine Davids
January 8, 2023 at 6:41 pm
Anything worth doing is worth doing half assed. My house stays clean now. Deep cleaning happens if I get a day off. Is it perfect? No. But it’s never more than 4 hrs from immaculate either. It started fights with my roommates because it wasn’t being done ‘right’, but it’s done, it’s sanitized even! And since they weren’t doing it, it gets to be done my way. This woman literally changed the way I live for the better!
Avin Zarlez
January 9, 2023 at 2:47 pm
The realization that she gave me, that everything worth doing is worth doing half assed, has had profound positive changes to the way I approach life in so many aspects.
Stephanie Kary
January 9, 2023 at 7:34 pm
🥺😭 This was beautiful 🥰 Nice job!!
JazzyontheMoon
January 9, 2023 at 8:57 pm
I related to this.. this was really informative
Jude Kapeluschnik
January 9, 2023 at 9:51 pm
I have never connected so much to a TED talk.